


Risks & Chances

by RestlessObligingBystander



Category: High School Musical: The Musical: The Series (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Bisexual E.J. Caswell, Bisexual Ricky Bowen (HSM: The Series), F/F, F/M, Friends to Lovers, Glee AU, High School, I dunno what else to tag, M/M, My first fic, Please Don't Kill Me, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-21
Updated: 2020-02-12
Packaged: 2021-02-25 23:14:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 20
Words: 33,312
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21883579
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RestlessObligingBystander/pseuds/RestlessObligingBystander
Summary: Glee AU where EJ is McKinley High’s school quarterback for three consecutive years and is still searching for his passion.And Ricky is a new student and a songwriter that never lets his songs see the light of day, he wants the world to hear them though he isn’t brave enough to try.Wonder what happens when the school’s glee club gets rebooted and signup sheets are posted around the campus.
Relationships: Big Red/Ashlyn Caswell, Gina Porter/Nini Salazar-Roberts, Ricky Bowen/E.J. Caswell, Seb Matthew-Smith/Carlos Rodriguez
Comments: 52
Kudos: 158





	1. Start of Something

**Author's Note:**

> first fic, please be kind  
> shoutout to the rj gc for inspiring me to write
> 
> i do not own these characters.
> 
> i hope you all enjoy :3

**Ricky’s POV**

_This is actual hell._ Ricky thought. He’s entering the third school that he has transferred to ever since his dad got this new job that required him to move to different locations every freaking year. Each year has been more daunting than the last. He tried to avoid making friends at his previous school ever since they started moving. Though it’s really hard not meeting people that you like. He learned from his past experiences that building relationships won’t really do him any good since he’ll be forced to forget about his friends when the year is over. He still tries to keeps in touch, though sometimes seeing your friends face-to-face is so much more comforting than simply chatting with them through your mobile phone.

This year he wants to make sure of that none of that happens. He’s gonna get through his first day and try to be as invisible as possible.

_Oof. I should really look at where I’m going. Note to self, I can still run into people while trying to be invisible._ He first looks at all the books he was carrying, now all on the floor. And next, to the two hands that were slowly picking them all up. Ricky quickly starts picking up the other books and repeatedly apologizes to the person that he bumped into. He picks up the last book and gets up to say sorry one more time. “I am so so so sorry” he says before he stops and gets intrigued by the person’s eyes. They were light green, sort of like the grass from the meadow behind their old house. He used to like just sitting there, close his eyes and think up random melodies he would later write down in his notebook. So peaceful. Sometimes he just went there to clear his mind and just forget about the world.

“Um… Hello? Are you okay?” says the person, trying to pull me back to earth.

“Oh sorry, I got distracted” says Ricky. The boy before him was tall, toned, had nice hair, nice smile, was wearing what looked like a varsity jacket, so most probably athletic, and lastly Ricky would admit, handsome. He personally never cared about what his sexuality was. He only had a year for his past two schools, so who was he to get picky. He’s had plenty of crushes on girls and guys, though he never pursued them since he knows that he’ll eventually have to move again. Even if he did and actually started a relationship with any of them, it would eventually lead to long-distance. Which from seeing how that had worked out with his mom and dad, he really wasn’t looking forward to that happening.

“That the second time today?” he laughs.

“Hopefully the last, umm… Hi I’m Ricky” _welp. mission failed. so much for not interacting with anyone this year._

“Elijah James, though most people just call me EJ”

“EJ, right…”

“So, you new here? Cause I think this is the first time I’ve ever seen you”

“Yeah, moved here from Salt Lake City”

“Salt Lake? Did you happen to go to that school where they tried to remake the High School Musical movies?”

“Yeah, I wasn’t able to join though.”

“Why not?” asked EJ, curiously.

“They didn’t think I was good enough, I guess.” _Well. More like **I** , didn’t think I was good enough. I actually never got the courage to audition for it._

“Well that sucks” EJ says. “Well, let me be the first to welcome you to McKinley High! Let me show you around”

“Thanks!” He proceeds to lead me to the cafeteria, the various offices, the classrooms and lastly the auditorium, which reminded him of the one they had at his old school. “Does the school do productions?” Ricky asked.

“Nope, but before they did. The glee club here used to manage the productions that was until Mr. Mazzara the school’s computer teacher got it shut down, so he could get more people into his robotics team.”

“That’s awful!” said Ricky.

“Yeah, would have loved to join though, but now I have to focus on training for this year’s football season, we already have a five-season win streak and I really don’t want to break that on my senior year.”

“That’s understandable”

“Anyways here’s the first class on your schedule” EJ says leading Ricky back to one of the classrooms they passed by earlier. “See you around?”

“Yeah, Thanks again EJ!”

“No problem!” said EJ, smiling before he leaves Ricky to head to his own class.

Well that was probably the best first interaction he’s ever had on any of his first days. He wasn’t really betting on having a handsome tour guide on the first day, guess maybe just maybe, this actually won’t be actual hell.

_Splash._ Ricky just stands there in shock while his clothes get wet. “Welcome to McKinley High loser!” a football jock says, while laughing and fist bumping his fellow jocks.

_Nevermind._ Ricky thought.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ricky got slushied :(
> 
> thats it for now!
> 
> there will be tons of references to the original show and from the glee tv show as well, maybe some story lines will be lining up/taking inspiration to original glee characters
> 
> try to see if you could spot which character takes after which ;)
> 
> anyways, ill try posting updates maybe once/twice a week? so for now... thanks for reading :3


	2. A Chance Encounter

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is basically EJ's POV of the first chapter. along with some backstory. enjoy :3

**EJ’s POV**

_This is it! Only a year left till graduation._ EJ thought. His high school journey was coming to an end.

He thinks back to when he joined the football team his junior year and got in as the team’s quarterback, that was the moment when he thought that he was the happiest guy at school. He’s been in the team for three years now, and he loves the sport, though always felt like something was missing. He met his best friend Nini during his sophomore year, when he needed some help for Ms. Jenn’s Spanish Class. Turned out Nini was actually fluent in a lot of languages and even learned accents like the British one that comes out when she gets nervous. They hit it off almost immediately and it sort of lead to a short-lived relationship. They decided it wasn’t working out though, so decided to stay as friends.

He really didn’t have many friends here at McKinley. Being the school quarterback, you’d think he’d be the most popular guy at school, having the coolest friends and the hottest girlfriend. Most of the guys on the team, EJ would admit were jerks, he was sad that he used to actually be one of them.

He actually slushied Carlos, during his sophomore year. That was a time when he obviously was still trying to fit in with the team. He spent a whole year becoming something he wasn’t, and he really regrets everything he’s done before. He met Nini midway that year and she got him to realize what he was doing, and he put a stop to it. The team would often give him a hard time, but given that he’s the team’s quarterback they tend to just leave him alone.

Carlos eventually became his step-brother after his mom got set up with Carlos’ dad (which was Carlos’ doing even though he wouldn’t admit to it). So aside from Nini, Carlos and his cousin Ashlyn, there’s actually no one else at this school that he hangs out with. And EJ was actually alright with that.

_Oof._ EJ accidentally bumped into someone on the way to class. He then quickly knelt down to help the person pick up his books. The boy kept saying sorry repeatedly while he started picking up everything else. When he finally got everything, he said sorry one more time then seemed to be in a trance.

_Is he staring at my eyes?_ “Um… Hello? Are you okay?” EJ says.

“Oh sorry, I got distracted” the boy says. EJ gets it, Nini always said that his eyes were actually mesmerizing and joked that it would definitely get him a girlfriend. She wasn’t wrong, though they did break it off after two weeks, so she wasn’t right either. EJ would admit however, though only to Nini, that the boy in front of him was actually really cute, with his curly hair, blank stare, and oversized sweater. So maybe they were both distracted.

“That the second time today?” EJ laughed.

“Hopefully the last, umm… Hi I’m Ricky” _Cute name._ EJ thought

“Elijah James, though most people just call me EJ”

“EJ, right…”

EJ learned that Ricky was a new student on his junior year. He transferred from two schools the past two years, and was now attending McKinley. He gave Ricky a warm welcome and offered to show him around. He quickly led him away from his teammates already holding slushie cups in their hands and led him to all the facilities and offices of the school. They arrived at the auditorium last. EJ really wished to join the glee club when he heard of it before. Nini actually heard a rumor that the glee club was rebooting last year though it never came. He gave up hope after that and now dedicates his time training for the upcoming football season.

He led Ricky back to his first class and he said his goodbye. “See you around?”

“Yeah, Thanks again EJ!”

“No problem!” EJ smiled, happy with how the first day was going. He quickly ran to his first class of the day which was Biology. There he saw Nini and quickly took the chair next to her.

“So Elijah James Caswell, why were you late on the first day?” Nini asked, her eyebrows raised.

“I had to show a boy around school, he was new”

“Ooh, finally making new friends?”

“I honestly wouldn’t mind that being the case, his name’s Ricky”

“What’s so special with that boy?”

“Well he’s… kind of… cute? I guess. Yeah” said EJ, smiling. Trying to remember Ricky’s features.

“Wait are you telling me that for the past year that I’ve been trying to get you a girlfriend, all it took was this one boy to actually catch those eyes of yours?” said Nini, mouth open in shock.

“What’s wrong with that?”

“Nothing.” said Nini, grinning like a Cheshire Cat. “Carlos would be gushing, lemme tell him” Nini quickly brings out her phone whilst squealing.

“Wait, don’t tell Carlos yet” EJ says, quickly grabbing Nini’s phone. “I literally just met Ricky, for all we know, we might not even become close friends”

“Eli, you haven’t ever considered having any kind of conversation with anyone else at this school apart from me, Carlos and Ashlyn. This guy got you to talk to him **and** show him around the second you guys meet. He’s obviously special”

“We’ll see.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> EJ will lowkey be symbolizing Finn while Carlos is Kurt in this AU. they'll be step-brothers here, though the part where Kurt had a crush on Finn is already in the past.
> 
> I think it works out pretty well with how Matt has described his difficulty dancing on the show, and how Finn was sort of the lousy dancer of the group. Carlos being his step-brother will definitely let the two bond when EJ has to learn dance moves, but thats only my thoughts :D
> 
> anyways hope you enjoyed this chapter. will post the next one soon. stay tuned :3


	3. New Opportunities

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thanks to the support of everyone reading, as well as my rj gc in twitter <3
> 
> love you all :3

**Ricky’s POV**

_What just happened?_ Ricky thinks.

The teacher just stares at him and tells him he could go clean up in the bathroom.

“Oh” said Ricky, still in shock, he quickly walks to the nearest comfort room, right before hearing someone else from the class excuse themselves.

“Hey, are you okay?” someone asks, while following him. He was short red head with a concerned look on his face. Ricky’s mind was still processing what had happened so all he could reply was.

“I’m not really sure?”

“Let me help you, I’m quite used these kinds of things” the person says

“Thanks” said Ricky, they both enter the boy’s comfort room and the person immediately brings out a towel from out of his bag.

“Here. Big Red by the way.” the person says smiling.

“Big Red? Is that a place?” Ricky asks, while taking the towel and starting to wipe the red colored drink off his face. They stuck pretty much to his whole face, though some of it has melted and soaked one of his favorite sweaters. _Don’t really know if this day was a good or bad one. It’s definitely a wild card at this point._

“Oh no” he says, while shaking his head. ”It’s my name, well it’s my nickname, everyone here at school calls me that”

“Oh that’s cool… I’m Ricky” He got his face clean, though his hair still had streaks of red left. He stared down to his sweater. Ricky sighed. He had plenty of sweaters and hoodies at home though the fact that his **white** sweater was now completely covered in red stains, got him a little frustrated.

“I have some extra clothes that you could maybe wear?” Big Red offers him a choice from three different shirts that he brought out of his bag. Ricky just stares for a moment at how much he had in his bag in case of emergencies.

“I always come prepared” he laughs. “It’s quite a necessity at this school”

“Thanks” said Ricky, as he takes the blue shirt from the pile Big Red offered. He enters one of the bathroom stalls to change while Big Red packed up his stuff.

“So, new student?” Big Red asks. “Where from?”

  
“Salt Lake City, My dad and I usually move each year, so yeah” said Ricky, after he finished changing clothes. He packs up his sweater and zips up his bag. He leans against the sinks and runs a hand through his wet hair. “It honestly sucks, but I can’t really do much about it”

“I was the new student last year. I remember also getting slushied on the first day, I was so humiliated that I skipped school for the rest of the day. So when I saw you at first period, I sort of saw myself.”

“No one offered you their help?”

“Nah, most of the people at this school just want to mind their own business. You’d have to have known your friends since your elementary years to have friends at this school. I actually only have one friend since last year, her name’s Gina. She’s in the cheerleading squad at this school called the Cheerios. We always got each other’s backs” Big Red says, smiling. He remembers how Gina actually stood up to one of the jocks that shoved him at one of the lockers. She said she was fed up with watching the jerks dominate everyone else. Big Red was lucky to have a friend like her, though it wouldn’t hurt to have another.

“Want to be friends?” asked Big Red, suddenly.

“Yeah absolutely, why not?” said Ricky, smiling at the second nice person he met since entering McKinley’s halls. They went back to class and Big Red invited him to come join him for lunch later, which Ricky immediately agreed to.

The next few periods were surprisingly uneventful. He waited for the bell to ring, before he got his stuff and walked to school cafeteria. He quickly got in line and got food from the lunch lady, who seemed kind. She offered him an extra muffin and Ricky mouthed a ‘thank you’ before leaving.

“Over here!” Big Red exclaimed, spotting Ricky. Ricky walks towards the table and greets Big Red with a smile.

“Hey Big Red, how was your other classes?” asked Ricky.

“Boring. As per usual.” Big Red jokes. Ricky laughed yet agreed as well.

“My, my, my, who do we have here?” Ricky turns around and sees a girl wearing what looks like a cheerleader’s uniform with the letters ‘WMHS’ in red font. “Making new friends without me Big Red? I’m hurt” the person jokes.

“Gina! This is Ricky. Ricky this is-”

“Gina Porter, sophomore, current head cheerleader of the Cheerios, co-captain of the school’s decathlon team and someone who will **never,** I repeat **never;** **hesitate** , **flinch** or **ever** back down if you so much as plan to throw even a **speck** of dirt, my way” said Gina, before eyeing Ricky up and down. Ricky definitely now believes Big Red when he said that this girl stood up to a jock. Ricky got easily intimidated, and just stared blankly. _I do not want to mess with her. ever._

“Go easy on him Gina, he got slushied on his first day at our school.” said Big Red, laughing at how protective Gina was being.

“Oh. Forgive me, Ricky? Ricky right?” she said, finally smiling, as to which Ricky nodded immediately “I’m just really skeptical of everyone at this school, everyone’s either a douche or pretending not to be one.”

“I’m not” said Big Red, sort of offended.

“Yes, and that’s why I like hanging out with you. And I guess if you thought Ricky here is good, then I guess I’d just have to trust you” said Gina, now looking over to Ricky and offering her hand to shake.

“Nice to meet you too” said Ricky, finally getting the voice to speak. He quickly shook hands with Gina and she took her seat, opposite of him. Big Red just laughs at how Ricky looked scared for that entire conversation. They began to start eating, Ricky sharing his story to Gina and vice versa. Gina immediately took to trusting him, which Big Red was actually happy about. Ricky scanned the cafeteria looking for a specific tall boy in a red letterman jacket, though to no avail. He instead settles in his seat and brings out a blue notebook from his bag.

“Whatcha’ doing?” Gina asks, obviously curious about everything concerning her new friend.

“Trying to finish one of my songs.” said Ricky. He’s been trying to finish this one for the past few weeks though he really couldn’t think up the right words. _I think I have that thing they call ‘writer’s block’ except it’s for songwriting. songwriter’s block. yeah, that’s probably what I had._

“Ohh you write songs?”  
  


“Yeah but I’ve been working on this one for more than a week now and I can’t seem to finish it. Can’t seem to clear my head for some reason.”

“Hmm… have you tried doing something outside your comfort zone? Always helps me when I need to clear my mind” Gina suggests.

“ **Attention! This is Principal Gutierrez speaking** ” a loud voice booms through the cafeteria. It was from the schools PA system. “ **Welcome back Titans, to a whole new year** ” Everyone was either quiet or distracting themselves with anything else. “ **A few announcements, we have a few new students this year, so please treat them with a warm welcome** ” A couple of jocks scoffed and laughed at this.

_Too late for that,_ Ricky thought.

“ **Aside from that, our Spanish Teacher, Ms. Jenn has decided to reboot our school’s glee club. Sign-up sheets will be posted around the school. That is all.** ” The principal didn’t sound quite happy announcing that. Ricky noticed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Gina symbolizes Santana in this AU (thats why she's really fierce and sassy)  
> while Big Red is his own person. im really not sure :)
> 
> anyways hope you enjoyed.. chap 4 will come soon


	4. Making Choices

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the POV at the start of the chapters may not make sense, since i still write in third person. basically the only point of that is so you guys know whose thoughts you are reading.
> 
> the text in italics are thoughts of whoever's 'POV' it is. sorry for the misuse of term.
> 
> here's chap 4 :3

**EJ’s POV**

EJ started heading out to meet with his friends at the bleachers near the field. They usually brought food with them and preferred to eat and chat there. Well to be honest, Carlos was the one who preferred it here. Everyone else just eventually got used to it. _The fresh air is always nice though._

“I am not risking my outfit getting ruined by another food fight” Carlos always says. Referring to the big food fight that happened last year, when one of the jocks decided to mess with the red head kid everyone calls ‘Big Red’. They purposely tripped him while he was walking toward his table, resulting in the mashed potatoes sticking to his face. Just then, while the jocks were laughing, a bowl filled with soup was chucked toward the jock who tripped Big Red, hitting him square on the face. Someone shouted ‘Food Fight!’ out loud then all hell broke loose.

He remembers vaguely how Carlos passed out when his vintage long fur coat got smudged with spaghetti sauce, he called Ashlyn over and they immediately proceeded bringing him to the clinic. EJ laughed at the memory.

“There you are” Ashlyn says as she spots him walking toward the bleachers. He greets his friends and brings out his food from his backpack, they immediately start talking about their days.

“So I have news, I heard from Ms. Jenn that she’s finally going to reboot the glee club!” said Carlos, before taking a short pause, letting the news sink in. He along with Nini and Ashlyn suddenly let out high-pitched squeals, to which EJ simply covered his ears to avoid. He just laughed and suddenly his face dropped. Nini noticed this and made a point to speak to EJ in private after their lunch break.

“Are you all auditioning? The sign-up sheets should be posted after school today.” asked Carlos.

“Hell yeah! What song should I sing? Should I go with a ballad or maybe a pop song?” Ashlyn replied, she, Carlos and Nini immediately discussed on what songs they will individually audition with.

EJ remembered the year before when that rumor spread about glee club reopening. Each of his friends had this same reaction. They never gave up hope though, even when it didn’t pull through. Ever since, Carlos has been repeatedly trying to convince Ms. Jenn to take it up.

Carlos was one of Ms. Jenn’s favorite students, the other being Nini. They both got A+ in her Spanish Class, so naturally Ms. Jenn was impressed and often talked to them, asking about their interests and whatnot. They learned that she was a member of the glee club back in the day here at McKinley and they won at Nationals her senior year. The previous principal of McKinley High used to have it out for the glee club like Mr. Mazzara. Though Ms. Jenn explained that the principal became very good friends with the previous club moderator and the club was there for years to stay.

Once Principal Guiterrez took the position, he agreed with Mr. Mazzara’s viewpoint that they should be funding their computers and robotics program instead of the performing arts. ‘It is the future’ as Mr. Mazzara always says. Glee club has been closed for nearly ten years now. It’s a wonder how Ms. Jenn convinced the Principal to reboot it. EJ imagines that the computer teacher must have been furious learning about the news.

They all finished up eating and said their farewells before heading to class. Nini walked with EJ, and before they entered the halls, she nudged him to the side and said that they needed to talk.

“What’s wrong? I thought you’d be equally as excited when finding out that the glee club is getting a reboot” asked Nini. She knew that EJ has been thinking about it ever since Carlos brought it up a while ago.

“I just really got my hopes high last year Nini.”

“Eli, We all did”

“Last year, when I found out that maybe the glee club was reopening, I was actually thinking of quitting the football team.” said EJ. “I didn’t feel like I belonged, most of the people on the team are jerks and I was really hoping to get away from that.” He paused.

“My mom was proud of me the day I joined the football team, and she said that I reminded her so much of my father. She reminds me every single day and that was the very reason I chose to stay.” She already knew most of what he was saying. He was trying to prove to himself that he doesn’t need to join the glee club.

“I held on to that for two years now. Making that decision to leave football team for the glee club last year was tearing me apart. I kept thinking that this, where I am right now, is exactly what my father would have wanted for me.”

“But is that really worth it? Is their happiness worth trading in for yours?” asked Nini.

“I really don’t know” EJ replied, sighing.

“Look, whatever your decision is, I support you. I just want you to promise to talk to us, your friends. Not just me. Carlos and Ashlyn care about you so much, you know? They're literally your family.” Nini said. EJ just silently nodded and paused to think.

“I’ll focus on training for football this year” said EJ, firmly. Nini offers him a hug. _Gosh, I'm lucky to have Nini as my best friend_.

“Okay, come on we’ll be late to class” said Nini, whilst pushing him towards the door. Nini’s smile changed to a frown the moment he looked away from her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The reason why EJ's dad is gone in this AU is cause he died serving the military. similar to how finn thought his dad actually died. EJ's dad wasn't dishonorably discharged tho. thats the only difference 
> 
> hope you enjoyed this chapter. might post chap 5 before christmas. not entirely sure tho. but stay tuned nonetheless.
> 
> advance merry christmas! :D


	5. Leaps of Faith

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> merry christmas to everyone! hope you're all having a great day so far.
> 
> or if its still december 24th from where you live, then i'll be greeting you all in advance. :D
> 
> here's chap 5, hope you enjoy. :3

**Ricky’s POV**

“There you go.” Gina offered. “You could sign up for the glee club.”

“What?” asked Ricky, confused with what Gina meant.

“You need to clear your mind right? So sometimes you just have to rush through and try new things.” she explained. “‘Sides you’re a songwriter, I’d assume you’d probably have a voice in there as well”

“Oh, no no no no” Ricky replied, quickly shaking his head. “My songs aren’t for human ears”

“So you only wrote them for yourself?”

“I write about what I feel. I guess I’m just not brave enough to share that with anyone else.”

“You express yourself with these songs, yet you don’t want anyone to hear them.” she answered back. “Isn’t the very point of music, to pour yourself into a clear glass for everyone else to see, so they could better understand how you truly feel?” The bell suddenly rang, signaling the end of lunch break. Big Red just looked between Gina and Ricky, while packing up his stuff. Ricky sat silently, pondering on what Gina said.

“Anyways I’ve got to go” said Gina. “Think about it!” she shouted while she was walking away.

“Hey, sorry if Gina is too much sometimes.” said Big Red. “She usually just speaks her mind no matter what the situation is. She gives good advice though.”

“Yeah, It’s ok” Ricky replied. Still thinking.

“Anyways I have to go now. My next class is PE, and the coaches here really don’t appreciate latecomers, or anyone for that matter. Coaches are scary.” he said, while waving Ricky a goodbye. Ricky just nodded in response. He was left alone with his thoughts.

 _Why **do** I write these songs? _Ricky wondered, while fixing his things. He heads to his next class and sits down at the very back corner of the room. He wasn’t really paying attention to the teacher, his mind was trying to find an answer to that very question. The bell soon rang signaling the end of the school day. Ricky’s daze was gone for a moment, enough to realize that he was the only one left in the room. He got his backpack and started walking.

_Should I join the glee club? Is this the chance?_ He stopped walking to see where he was. He ended up near the locker room, and coincidentally there was a bulletin board right at the entrance. His eyes wondering to a specific sheet of paper. The words ‘Glee Club’ and ‘Sign up below’ printed at the very top with multiple lines below. He simply stood there staring at it. _I can’t really think of anyone I’d want to share my songs with._

“Ricky?” a voice pulling him from his thoughts.

Ricky turned around to see a tall boy wearing a red varsity jacket carrying a sports bag on one shoulder. Ricky’s blank face immediately turning into a smile. “Oh, EJ! I didn’t see you at the cafeteria today?”

“Oh yeah, ‘bout that. My friends and I usually eat out at the bleachers near the football field. There was a food fight last year, and one of my friends really wants to avoid that kind of situation.” he laughs.

“Oh”.

“So… you’re signing up for the glee club?” EJ asked.

“I was thinking about it. How about you? Didn’t you say you wanted to join last year?” Ricky felt his mind was suddenly at ease. He felt so comfortable talking to EJ, and he didn’t know why. He literally only met the guy this morning. Sure, he met other people today. Big Red and Gina were so kind to him and quickly accepted him into their small group. With EJ, it feels different. He felt drawn to him somehow.

“I did, but I made a promise to myself that I’ll be focusing on my training for football.” EJ answered, to which Ricky immediately felt saddened by.

“You could always do both? I mean if you really wanted to, then it must be something that would make you happy” Ricky felt the words just flowing through. Something deep inside him hoped EJ would also join. He felt braver when he was around EJ for some reason. His presence somehow answers all the questions he was preoccupied with since lunch period.

“Thanks, but I don’t know how I would be able to do that.” he pauses. “We’ll see.” he says.

“Hope you figure it out” said Ricky, with a smile. His mind was decided. He felt all his fears and worries diminish. He was going to join. He took the pencil dangling from the board and wrote down his name. He stared at his name written in cursive, on the very first line.

“I guess I’ll wish you good luck then!” EJ says, while smiling.

“Thanks!” Ricky paused. EJ said that he was going to head to practice and slowly started to enter through the doors of locker room. “Hey EJ?”

“Yeah?” he replied, while turning around.

Ricky’s mind was blank, but then he stepped toward EJ and offered him a hug, to which EJ returned after a brief moment. Ricky stepped back. “Umm… I just wanted to say thanks for being the first person who welcomed me here. At first I thought this would just be another school that I’d sulk around in, dropping by then taking off. I was dreading walking through these halls and becoming another outsider. It felt like a nightmare but after this morning it felt like a fresh start.” He stopped, to think. _Thanks for giving me the courage to join the glee club._ Ricky then said, in his mind.

EJ just stood there silently, yet with a smile that never faded.

“Anyways, you probably have to go practice now. See you tomorrow?” said Ricky.

“Yeah. Will do."

Ricky walked towards the exit filled with excitement and happiness. He couldn’t wipe the smile from his face on the way home. When he finally got home, his father greeted him as he entered the door.

“Good evening. How was your first day?” his father says. His dad turns around and sees Ricky with a smile so wide that he didn’t even need an answer.

“It was the best!” said Ricky.

“That’s good. Dinner will be ready by 8 ok?” he said, happy that his son was smiling on his first day.

“Sure thing! I’ll be up in my room” he said, before heading upstairs. He jumps on his bed and giggles, looking up at the ceiling of his bedroom. He sits back up and grabs his backpack. _What song should I go with?_ He wondered.

Ricky zips open his bag and immediately goes for his blue notebook. He opens it to one of the pages, staring at the words he wrote there. He wrote this song the first time they moved. It was about taking a chance not knowing how long you’ll have it for. He wrote it for himself, not for anyone in particular. Knowing that you have limited time, you’d think you would try to do what you can, in the time that you have. Ricky was never brave enough to do that. But after today, he felt like he finally was.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ricky gets over his fears and takes on the world bravely, thanks to someone... <3
> 
> will start work on chap 6 in a while so stay tuned! 
> 
> and once again, happy holidays! :3


	6. Fleeting Time

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> greetings again! so i hope everyone had a wonderful christmas :D
> 
> anyways, ive been a little slow writing recently so apologies for that
> 
> heres chap 6 starting with EJ's POV of the last chapter

**EJ’s POV**

“Bye guys!” EJ says. Everyone was heading home for the day. EJ still had football practice to go to, so Ashlyn was going to bring Carlos home instead.

  
“I almost forgot that you had football practice three times a week.” said Carlos.

“Today’s training is actually optional. Coach wants us to officially start this Wednesday.”

“Why not skip it then?” Ashlyn suggested.

“Nah, I sort of need to clear my mind right now. You guys drive home safe, okay?”

“This is gonna be boring, Ashlyn never lets me choose the songs” said Carlos, both EJ and Ashlyn laughing at his plight. EJ waved them one more goodbye before heading back inside school. On the way to the locker rooms, he saw many of the bulletin boards already having the glee club sign-up sheet. He knew Nini, Carlos and Ashlyn all signed up already. He wasn’t going to be sad about it. He made himself clear. He’s focusing on his football training this year. When he was nearing the locker room he noticed a figure standing right outside of it. The person was staring at the bulletin board. As he got closer he realized who it was.

“Ricky?”

“Oh, EJ!” said Ricky, his face almost immediately forming into a smile. “I didn’t see you at the cafeteria today.”

He simply explained that they eat outside at the school bleachers ever since last year’s food fight. He looks behind Ricky, at what he was staring at, before he came.

“So… you’re signing up for the glee club?” EJ asked.

“I was thinking about it. How about you? Didn’t you say you wanted to join last year?”

“I did, but I made a promise to myself that I’ll be focusing on my training for football.” he answered, to which he noticed Ricky’s smile dropping a bit.

“You could always do both? I mean if you really wanted to, then it must be something that would make you happy” _Wait… does Ricky want me to join?_ He wondered.

“Thanks, but I don’t know how I would be able to do that.” EJ pauses. _Could I?_ He knew deep down inside, he still wanted to join. Ricky was trying to encourage him to. “We’ll see.” he says, Ricky’s big smile returning to how it was a moment ago.

“Hope you figure it out” said Ricky. He paused, then turned around to write his name on the sign-up sheet.

“I guess I’ll wish you good luck then!” EJ says, while smiling.

“Thanks” Ricky replied. The part of him that wanted to join, was telling him to write his name right under Ricky’s. He shook his head and started walking toward the doors.

“Hey EJ?”

“Yeah?” he replied, while turning around. There was an awkward pause. But then something happened. Ricky hugged him. Which sort of surprised him for a moment. He returned the hug, and he felt happy. It feels as though that’s where Ricky belonged, in his arms. _Did he really just think that? …Was Nini right when she said Ricky might be special?_

When Ricky took a step back. He couldn’t form any words. His mind was buzzing. All he could do was stand there and offer Ricky a reassuring smile.

“Anyways, you probably have to go practice now. See you tomorrow?”

“Yeah. Will do."

EJ went home that day double thinking his decisions. Something about talking to Ricky that evening, was leading him to question himself. The glee club auditions were still this Friday though, so he had plenty of time to think.

The rest of the week was a blast. He saw Ricky again on Wednesday morning. Ricky was wondering if he could eat lunch with EJ and his friends, to which he agreed to. He also asked if he could bring **his** friends along with him, and that’s exactly what happened. He agreed to meet up with Ricky at the cafeteria by lunch period.

EJ recognized the red head kid ‘Big Red’ but there was also a Cheerio with them. The girl stared down at EJ, and it gave him the chills. Ricky introduced them both to EJ, to which Gina, he learnt was the name of the girl, just scoffed at. EJ led them to the bleachers where Nini, Carlos and Ashlyn were waiting. It was EJ’s turn to introduce his friends.

“So yeah, this is Nini, Ashlyn and Carlos.” EJ said, while pointing to each of them.

“Guys this is Ricky, Big Red, and Gina” Again pointing to each as he said their name. There was an awkward pause.

“Okay… we are so glad to meet you all honestly. Let’s eat?“ said Carlos, trying to break the silence.

EJ looked at Ricky, hoping that this whole group get together wasn’t going to fall apart. Ricky just returned a nervous smile, and shrugged. They each shared their backgrounds, but when the topic changed to glee club, everyone was suddenly giving input. Turns out Ricky’s group was just as excited for it as his own friends were. Gina said that she was planning to audition with Big Red, they were going to do a dance number that would showcase Big Red’s tap-dancing skills. EJ let out a breath of relief. He took a glance at Ricky, which he saw was finally smiling for the first time after they arrived. EJ smiled as well.

It was finally Friday evening, and despite most of his friends along with his new ones trying to convince him to audition, he held back. Nini was proud of him finally making new friends, though EJ would admit that it was all thanks to Ricky.

He soon learned that he had a difficulty saying ‘No’ to Ricky, while he was trying to convince him to join. He hated seeing Ricky’s face drop even a little. He never wanted to see Ricky upset. Something about Ricky, just made EJ want to always keep him happy.

“Ok, that’s it for today” their coach said. Their practice for the day had ended. EJ lazily packed his stuff and proceeded to walk to the school’s exit. As he passed by the auditorium he heard music. The auditions were still ongoing. He felt drawn to go inside, which he eventually did. He was shocked to see Ricky on stage sitting on the piano.

“Hi, I’m Ricky Bowen, and I’ll be singing a song that I wrote” Ricky began to play a few chords. EJ felt glued to the spot as Ricky began to sing.

♫ Time is fleeting

I'll be leaving

So make it count ♫

EJ just stood there listening Ricky’s soothing voice. This was the first time he’s heard one of Ricky’s songs. He always saw Ricky writing on his little blue notebook. When he finally asked Ricky about it, he was amazed to hear that Ricky wrote songs. He never asked to hear any of them though, thinking that he might cross the line and make Ricky upset.

♫ I've been thinking

I'm still afraid of sinking

Scared I won’t get out ♫

As he listened to Ricky’s lyrics, he realized he was singing about his experience moving school to school every year. Always having limited time to meet new people and make new memories. He could feel the emotion with every word Ricky sang. The chords suddenly changed signaling the start of the chorus.

♫ So kiss me while you can

Before it gets too late

Don’t let go of my hand

Ignore the expiration date ♫

♫ Time is running out

Make the love songs last

When it all comes crashing down

I wish it hadn’t gone so fast ♫

_Ricky wrote this **for** someone?_ _Did he like someone before?_ EJ thought. _Does he like someone now?_ He felt a bit agitated at that last thought.

♫ Take me by the hand

Kiss me while you can ♫

The fact that there was a chance that Ricky wrote this song recently, meaning he could have possibly wrote it for someone he met at their school. EJ felt hopeful. _Why?_ _Am I actually hoping that it’s for me?_ He exits the auditorium with that exact thought. He left just as Ricky finished his song.

♫ Take me by the hand

Kiss me while you can ♫

He went home with a dozen thoughts in his head. He was a bit shocked when he realized he was jealous of whoever Ricky was singing about. He did realize that Ricky and Nini seemed to hit it off. They often talked during this week’s lunch periods. _Did Ricky like Nini?_ _Why was he jealous?_ He was Ricky’s friend, so shouldn’t he happy for Ricky? He spent the whole night contemplating on what Ricky’s song meant, and who it was for. _Do I have feelings for Ricky?_ He thought, before passing out from exhaustion.

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so one of ricky's songs is 'Kiss Me While You Can'!!! <3
> 
> i do not own the rights to this song, the song belongs to the wickedly talented Joshua Bassett,  
> song was originally posted on his twitter, check it out if you still havent:  
> https://twitter.com/joshuatbassett/status/1195396374021304320
> 
> i just wanted to find a way to incorporate his songs into the story since they are so good and catchy and i personally love them.
> 
> so yeah, thats chap 6 i hope you all enjoyed, will start on chap 7 soon so stay tuned :3


	7. Taking Risks

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chap 7 is here! 
> 
> this is the weekend after the first week  
> this will still be in EJ's perspective
> 
> hope you enjoy! :D

**EJ’s POV**

EJ woke up to his head pounding. He already had a feeling that this day was not going to go well for him. He took his phone from his nightstand and checked the time. It was 10AM, he overslept. He usually wakes up early on the weekends to help out with any chores his mom would need his help with. EJ groaned and walked to the bathroom. He quickly took a bath and wore a change of clothes before heading downstairs.

“Good Morning knucklehead!” said Carlos. “You missed chores today.”

“Yeah, about that…”

“Shh… It’s alright. Dad already said that you might oversleep. You literally got home and didn’t notice them greet you, you just went straight to your room. He said you might have been exhausted, so I let you sleep in.”

“Where’s Mom?”

“Out doing the groceries. She should be back in a while” replied Carlos. EJ simply nodded to this and started walking to the kitchen.

“How was the auditions?” EJ asked, hesitantly. He started fixing himself a cereal bowl for brunch. Carlos sat at the table at the far edge before answering his question.

“It was great! Everyone actually got in. Which sort of defeats the purpose of auditioning, but hey whatever floats Ms. Jenn’s boat.”

He must have shown a tad bit of envy and sadness on his face. Carlos immediately noticed this and called him out.

“I have a feeling your decision not to join isn’t really set in stone, now is it? Cause’ every time any of us talk about it, you start having that mopey look on your face. Don’t think that I won’t notice it.” said Carlos.

“I thought I knew what I wanted.”

“What changed then?”

“I guess seeing you all happy is making me realize that I’m really not.”

“Let me ask you this.” Carlos said, while gesturing at him. “Why is football so important to you that you can’t let it go?”

He never really opened up to Carlos before. It was always with Nini. He knew that he probably should. Carlos was his step-brother, he literally spends more time with him than with Nini. _I just want you to promise to talk to us, your friends. Carlos and Ashlyn care about you so much, you know? They’re literally your family._ Nini’s words echoed in his head.

“My dad used to play for the McKinley Titans. He got the Championship Trophy for his team four years in a row. Every time he got home from the military he would make sure to spend time teaching me how to play the sport. That’s how I fell in love with it. I fell in love with it because it was one of the few things I was able to enjoy with him.” He felt a sting at his eyes. It felt so much better letting another person listen. He always poured his feelings out to Nini and no one else.

“I feel like if I let go of it. I’m letting go of all those memories of him. I feel like I’m letting him down.” He finished.

“Look, I know I’m not really the right person to speak on your father’s behalf but it’s quite obvious that your father loved you so much. I am completely certain that he’d be supportive of whatever makes you happy.”

“Carlos is right, Eli.” his mom’s voice drawing his attention. She was carrying three grocery bags with her, so Carlos immediately stood up to help, while she talked to him.

“I know that I always tell you how proud I am that you’re following your father’s footsteps." she started walking towards him.

  
  
"But following him doesn’t necessarily mean that you give up on your own dreams." she held EJ's hands, while the tears started flowing.

"It’s about being the same kind of person that he was. He was a person that always did what was right and chased for his life’s desires.” she paused. EJ realized that she was getting somewhat teary-eyed as well.

EJ loved his family so much. He can't believe that there was a time when it was always only him and his mother. When Carlos came along with his dad, he was a bit distraught. He was angry that mom was okay with replacing dad in their lives. He soon came to realize that his mom deserved to be happy, no one has been as depressed as her after hearing the news that his father was gone. She was always so supportive of him, that he decided to do the same.

“I want you to always remember this. Always remember that I will always be proud of you no matter what, and I’m certain that your father would be too.” she reached out for him and offered him a heart-warming embrace. He wiped his own tears and told his mom he loves her so much, to which she returned immediately.

“Okay… that’s enough tears for today. You missed your morning chores, so now you’re forced to help me cook lunch” his mom said, wiping her eyes while laughing.

“Maybe that’s not a good idea” Carlos joked.

“Hey! My grilled cheese sandwiches are to die for!” said EJ, defending himself.

“Yeah but any other food you make literally tries to kill us instead” Carlos fired back. His mom and Carlos laughed so hard, and all he could do is smile. He loved his family so much. He truly did.

He tried helping his mom, though that obviously wasn't working out. Cause' she soon told him to take a seat instead, and let Carlos help her instead. Hand him any other house chore aside from cooking and he could definitely do it. Never trust him to cook. He laughed in his mind. Once the food was done, he quickly set up the dining table with plates and glasses. Carlos’s Dad came back from the Repair Shop and they all sat together and ate lunch happily.

Afterwards while cleaning up the table and doing the dishes Carlos excitedly asked him a single question. “So what song do you plan auditioning with?” He said, with a smirk.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> EJ is finally taking the risk :3
> 
> He won't be quitting the football team tho, he'll be juggling both  
> let's hope that turns out all right
> 
> chap 8 soon! stay tuned


	8. Last Minute

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> here's chap 8!
> 
> hope you all enjoy this one! :D
> 
> try to spotting the references in this one :3

**Ricky’s POV**

Ricky found himself shaking as the bell rang for the last class of the day. Today was the first glee club meeting and he couldn’t wipe the smile from his face. The auditions were great, all his friends got in. There was a girl named Natalie who auditioned with ‘I Kissed A Girl’ by Katy Perry. As well as, Kourtney who went with ‘R.E.S.P.E.C.T.’ by Aretha Franklin. Everyone’s jaw dropped while watching her performance. So the glee club currently had eight members, which was a fact that Carlos was distressed about.

_Carlos created a group conversation._

_Carlos named the group conversation ‘ Glee Club ♫ ’._

Carlos: guys we have a problem 😟 😟 😟

Natalie: what is it?

Ricky: wat?

Carlos: we need 1 more member to join so we can actually compete

Big Red: wot?

Carlos: it says in the show choir rule book that each competing group must be comprised of at least ten members

Big Red: 👍

Big Red: sorry misclick

Kourtney: dont fuss 🙄

Ashlyn: oh my

Kourtney: pretty sure we can find more members before then

Nini: yeah

Nini: don’t worry too much ♥♥

Ricky: wait there’s still only eight of us

Ricky: we still need 2 more

Carlos: oh yeah mb 😆

Carlos: all this stress is affecting my maths

Gina: want me to slap you out of it 😆

Big Red: dont even try

Ashlyn: stopppppp

Everyone was really just happy with the fact that the glee club officially exists. They could worry about the other stuff later.

He entered the doorway to the Choir Room, and his smile grew even larger when he was greeted by all his friends. Everyone was so giddy and practically jumping on their seats. Ricky was glad he finally took a chance.

“Welcome one and all!” said Ms. Jenn, after waiting for everyone to settle down. “To the very first meeting of the rebooted glee club!” Everyone started cheering and shouting out hoots.

“Before we get started with introductions, we still have one more member who decided to join at the last minute.” The room was suddenly silent and everyone started whispering, everyone except Carlos, who had a knowing smile plastered on his face.

Just then a guitar started playing out of nowhere, and was soon accompanied with a deep voice.

♫ Tell me somethin', girl

Are you happy in this modern world? ♫

The voice sounded familiar. Though Ricky couldn’t put a name on it yet. He knew that it was coming from the doorway he entered in.

♫ Or do you need more?

Is there somethin' else you're searchin' for? ♫

He realized who the voice belong too, but he was in disbelief. After all, the person was standing by their own decision, and Ricky wanted so much to respect that. It was the person that was one of the main reasons he was sitting in this room in the first place.

♫ I'm falling

In all the good times I find myself longin'

For change

And in the bad times I fear myself ♫

The chorus started playing, and EJ stepped into view at the door, strumming a guitar. EJ’s eyes immediately met his while he was singing, and Ricky felt himself smiling.

♫ I'm off the deep end, watch as I dive in

I'll never meet the ground

Crash through the surface, where they can't hurt us

We're far from the shallow now ♫

EJ went around and smiled at everyone while he was singing, as if he was greeting them all.

♫ In the sha-ha, sha-la-low

In the sha-sha-la-la-la-low

In the sha-ha, sha-ha-ha-low

We're far from the shallow now ♫

He stopped walking when he was directly in front of Ricky. He played the last few chords and sang the last words.

♫ We're far from the shallow now ♫

Nini came up to hug him, while everyone started applauding his performance. Ricky was stuck on his seat, still amazed that EJ was actually there. _He actually joined!_ Ricky squealed in his mind.

“I know that I’ve literally blocked everyone from encouraging me to take this chance.” said EJ. “My friends wanted me to be happy, and they knew that being here, in the glee club, singing songs and dancing my heart out with everyone might be what I’ve actually been looking for.”

“I want to thank each one of my friends and my family, for supporting me.” EJ paused. He then looked directly at Ricky. “I want to thank Ricky most importantly for bringing me out of my shell. Without you I would have never tried to meet new people. Even though some of them scare me.” He said, pertaining to one person in the room.

“Don’t push me Caswell.” Gina said, while smiling. The whole room burst into laughter.

“I would have been content with what I had. Staying where I was. But you’ve shown me that there’s so much more that I can do.” He said. Ricky finally stood up and offered him a hug. Everyone clapped once again.

“Alright! With all that aside, we can finally start our first official meeting!” said Ms. Jenn, signaling everyone to take their seats.

They had the glee club meetings every Monday. Everyone was truly amazing, every other meeting someone would volunteer from time to time to perform in front. Ms. Jenn even started to have sing-offs to fuel everyone’s competitive sides for sectionals. EJ actually got two people from the football team to join, so they were officially a contender for the show choir competition. Their names were Cayden and Riko, who were actually really nice surprisingly.

Carlos invited everyone to eat at Breadstix one Friday Night just so they can all talk freely without the stress of academics, practices and whatnot.

“This place seems cool.” said Ricky. As he entered with Nini, Big Red and Gina. They all slid into one of the booths that Carlos reserved for them.

“Dude, I actually heard a rumor that this place serves unlimited breadsticks.” Big Red whispered to him. Everyone else arrived shortly, except for EJ, Cayden and Riko. They decided to take their orders while waiting. They all started talking about their personal lives for once. Seeing each other at school they sort of already knew each other's situations. The door soon opened once again, and Ricky looked over to see who it was.

“Sorry we’re late. Coach was giving us a hard time again.” said EJ finally arriving with his two teammates. Ricky still can’t get over the fact that the rest of the football team wasn’t supportive of them joining the glee club. They were giving all three of them, most especially EJ a hard time at school.

One time, EJ was walking Ricky to class when one of the football jocks gave EJ his first slushie.

**_*insert flashback noises*_ **

“You can’t do this!” EJ exclaimed, out of anger. Ricky was in pure shock, and wasn’t able to say anything.

“Oh yes we can. You know, we were all fine with the fact that you decided to join loserville. But then you dragged in two more members from the team. You trying to get us to lose Caswell?”

“I didn’t force them to join, they wanted to. Who was I to stop them?”

“Well we **wanted** to do this, so who are **you** to stop us.” the jock laughed with his friends and they all walked away.

Ricky accompanied EJ to the bathroom and quickly took a towel out from his bag. EJ took it from him and said ‘Thanks’ before facing the mirror and taking his jacket and shirt off. He set them both down at the nearest sink and then proceeded to wipe the blue slushie from his face and neck. Ricky felt his cheeks redden, before turning around and distracting himself. _Oh gosh. I did not expect that to happen._ He thought.

He sort of thought that it might happen, but Ricky assumed that EJ would change in one of the stalls. _Well he doesn’t really have anything to be ashamed of, to be honest._ EJ was a football player so it was natural for him to have a toned body, with abs and muscles. Ricky probably just wasn’t used to seeing EJ without his red varsity jacket, that’s why he was in shock.

“Hey Ricky? You can turn around now.” said EJ. Ricky saw that EJ simply wore his varsity jacket directly without an undershirt. “My extra clothes are still at the locker room. Thanks for the towel though.” Ricky couldn’t find himself to talk. “Ricky?”

“Oh yeah, Umm… let’s head to class? We’re probably already late.” He finally said, still flustered. EJ nodded and they both headed off to their classrooms.

“Ricky? Ricky? RICKY!” Gina screamed, snapping him out of his flashback. “You’re food has been sitting there for about ten minutes now. You’re breadsticks are all gone. Don’t blame me.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> again, i do not own any songs used in this story
> 
> here's the link Matt's 'Shallow' cover on instagram:  
> https://www.instagram.com/p/BwcpaFQAUX7/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading  
> if you want to check it out <3
> 
> just to clarify, Cayden is the white haired boy  
> while Riko is the guy who plays Ryan, both from hsmtmts
> 
> so that's chap 8! for all the gleeks reading, did u spot the references? :3  
> there's also a hsmtmts reference (shout out to a specific scene) 
> 
> anyways i will start working on chap 9 soon! hope you enjoyed! stay tuned :D


	9. Making a Move

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> advance happy new years to everyone reading! :D
> 
> this will probably be the last chapter for this year, will continue this after jan 1st
> 
> anyways, here's chap 9! hope you enjoy :3

**EJ’s POV**

EJ couldn’t describe how happy he’s been ever since he joined glee club. Everyone’s been really great! There were weeks when they solely focused on songs from one artist. Ms. Jenn explained that it was so, they could understand the emotion, essence and style of different artists, and incorporate that in their performances. Nonetheless, it was a great experience. Aside from his teammates constantly giving him a hard time, he’d definitely say that this was the best decision he’s made in his life. He got to spend more time with all his friends.

“So should I just ignore the fact that you’ve been glancing at Ricky exponentially throughout the past three weeks?” said Nini, while they were taking a break from rehearsals. EJ froze, and wasn’t able to reply.

“Look Eli, I told you Ricky was special, and that does seem like the case. So why are you spending your time running around in circles?”

“It’s not like that. I’m not even sure if he likes me back.”

“Oh my god! You are definitely the most oblivious guy I’ve ever met. I swear to god I’ve caught Ricky multiple times, looking when you’re not.”

“I was there at his audition okay? When he sang that song he wrote. I kept thinking that he wrote it for someone else.”

“Ricky said he wrote that song during his sophomore year.”

“Oh.”

“And what makes you think that it couldn’t have been for you?”

“Ricky’s just too good for me. Okay?”

“Awww. Eli.” said Nini, while offering him a hug. “You really shouldn’t think that way. Elijah James Caswell, you are a catch. Those girls I set you up with fell head over heels, personality, flaws and all. They just weren’t, Ricky.” EJ just didn’t know what to say.

“Look, you took a chance to meet new people and to join the glee club. I think it’s time you took a chance on Ricky as well.”

“I guess, I could.” said EJ. “You know, I actually thought that he wrote his audition song for you” He said, laughing nervously.

“That would have been flattering, though I have my eyes set on someone else.”

“Really who?” EJ asked, curiously.

“I’m not talking until you make your move.” said Nini, laughing.

“Hey Nini, want to run through the dance routine?” said Gina, coming towards them. Nini didn’t answer for a few seconds, before suddenly she did.

“ _Oh… Umm… Alright, just lemme warm up first ‘kay?_ ” said Nini. EJ tried his best to hold in his laughter, though some of it managed to escape his mouth. Nini was talking with her British accent. EJ knew exactly what that meant. When Gina left them alone, Nini started elbowing him in the stomach.

“Now you’re going to have to ask Bowen out, or I will murder you” she said, obviously not amused that he figured her out.

“ _Alright, gov’ner_ ” said EJ, while saluting to her. He shook his head while smiling as he left Nini alone with Gina.

It seemed like the whole world was suddenly out to get him. Every time he was able to get Ricky alone, someone would interrupt, forcing them to agree to talk another time. One time, it was his Dad calling ‘bout a small emergency at home, which meant Ricky had to leave earlier than he should. Sometimes it would be their friends, asking Ricky if they could borrow him for piano lessons. Sometimes he would be busy with group projects, homework and whatnot. He does admit that there were times that he’d chicken out. _Don’t tell Nini that though. She might murder me._ He tried to ask Ricky for the rest of the week, but to no avail. He had the worst luck possible.

_I can’t breathe._ EJ thought.

“Hey, you want to take five?” said Carlos, barely sweating. He knows that he’s supposed to have as much endurance, given that he’s in the football team. Though the fact that they were at this for almost 7 hours, without even getting much progress, must have got to him.

“Yeah, yeah.”

Carlos was currently teaching him their latest dance routine. It was the first out of three, which EJ groaned about earlier. Ms. Jenn was begging Carlos to give him dance lessons, ever since she noticed how bad his two left feet were. Remember when he said don’t trust him to cook? Well don’t trust him to dance either. EJ was embarrassed at the fact that some of the moves seemed too simple. One of them was literally a step-step-point, though for some reason he still can’t do that right.

“So how goes operation, Ask Ricky Out?” Carlos asked. EJ wasn’t surprised Carlos knew about his efforts. Nini usually told him everything. Though it wasn’t farfetched that Carlos figured it out on his own. He was quite perceptive of these types of things.

“Failing miserably. I keep getting interrupted by literally everything!” said EJ.

“Each day it gets closer to the first exam week, it gets busier and busier.” Carlos explained. “How about asking him through a call?”

“I never actually thought about doing that.” Mentally face palming himself. “Though wouldn’t it be better to ask him in personal?” EJ asked.

“Yeah, it is always better to talk face-to-face, but given the circumstances I don’t think you’ll be having that chance anytime soon. We’re too busy learning dance routines, exams are coming up so that means tons of school work, and if I’m not mistaken you have your first game before exam week?”

“Yeah, first game of the season.” said EJ. “Alright, I guess I don’t have much of a choice.” He brought out his phone and quickly clicked the ‘Contacts’ icon before scrolling to find Ricky’s name. When he finally found it his fingers simply hovered at the call button. _I can do this._ _I can do this. Ask Ricky out. That shouldn’t be too hard._ _I got this. I really do._ He heard a sound coming from his phone. Carlos pressed it for him, before walking out of the room and wishing him ‘good luck’.

“Hello?” a voice came through.

“Hey Ricky?” EJ said, nervously. “Did I umm… call at a bad time? Are you… busy?”

“Not at all” Ricky replied.

“Oh… Cool, Umm…” He paused. _Just get over it!_ His mind was telling him. “Can I ask you something?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> EJ's gonna ask Ricky out :O  
> 'bout time ;)
> 
> hope you guys liked this chapter!  
> will probably post chap 10 after new years, so stay tuned! :3


	10. Memories

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> happy new year to everyone! i hope you guys had a great celebration!
> 
> updates might be slower than usual, since i have things i have to do.
> 
> anyways, here's chap 10. i hope you enjoy.

**Ricky’s POV**

Ricky was having the time of his life. This school has been the best he’s ever attended so far. He’s made so many friends. It makes him worry how hard it will be to let everyone go. _Don’t think about it. Don’t ruin the mood._ He didn’t want to remind anyone of his impending fate. No one needs to be sad about it.

Each of his friends were so dear to him. Everyone was so kind and caring. He’s actually incredibly lucky to have met them all. He’s already made tons of memories with each of them.

Big Red shared an interest with him in video gaming, which became their weekly hangout ritual. Gina would usually join them, but she’d just watch them play, always saying that video games weren’t really her thing. One time, he got Gina to play Smash Bros. with them, and she basically destroyed both of them. _Yeah right. ‘Not her thing’_

Nini and Ashlyn, he soon found out, were actually two of his fellow songwriters. He’d sometimes ask advice from both of them, when he has trouble with his own songs. They usually share their ideas and suggestions to each other whenever they finish one. _I love hearing their songs, they are all so good! I honestly wish I was as good as them._

Kourtney, Carlos and Natalie would often invite him to shop for clothes. They volunteered to deal with the glee club’s costumes for performances. They had the most style out of everyone, though they always comment on how lovely all Ricky’s sweaters and hoodies were. _Dad sort of wants me to donate some of them. Says that I have too many. No. There is no such thing as too many._

Riko and Cayden were two of the best dancers aside from Gina, Big Red and Carlos, so he'd often ask them for assistance with dance routines. Dancing wasn't really his strongest suit. _I apparently have two left feet._ He already tried asking Gina for help last time, and that was a horrific experience. Gina was very strict when it came to dance tutoring. She was always going too fast, and was really critical with every move, it all had to be perfect. Big Red was only comfortable teaching tap dancing, which really wasn’t what he needed. And Carlos was already busy helping someone else.

Speaking of which. Last but not the least, there was EJ.

There were so many qualities that made Ricky admire EJ. He had a great voice. It was deep and mellow. And Ricky swears he could just listen to it every single day. It’s like a flowing ocean, like it could drown him if he lets it.

Whenever EJ was in the same room he couldn’t help but smile. EJ seemed to always bring this aura with him. He was like a light in a dark room. Gina would always disagree with him, though everyone else believes that EJ was a born leader. He takes charge when everyone else loses hope.

Ricky remembers when EJ took the lead when Ms. Jenn’s job was on the line. Mr. Mazzara exposed her fake teaching credentials and Principal Guiterrez was not happy about it when he found out. Apparently, Ms. Jenn was only learning Spanish from an online course she was currently taking. The Glee Club had to be disbanded if Ms. Jenn was fired and everyone was too depressed to do anything about it. _They haven’t even competed yet!_

When they learned that the school board would call a meeting to expulse her the next day, EJ got everyone together to prepare a number and show everyone at school what Ms. Jenn has accomplished. She later explained that she applied to become the Music Teacher, but when she learned that Performing Arts was removed from McKinley she settled for the next available job. EJ convinced the school board that Ms. Jenn has done so much for them, and she was able to stay.

Though Ricky’s favorite quality of EJ was probably that he was one of the kindest souls he’s met at McKinley. One of the things EJ always does is that he would walk Ricky to class, just so he can watch over him. Ricky was still the new kid, so he still frequently got slushies. And EJ really wanted to minimalize that. They have to walk faster than usual though, since the jocks were also targeting EJ apart from himself. Which would lead to small talk and quick farewells. This past week he realized EJ has been trying to tell him something, though he’d always be too busy with school work and rehearsals.

“Hey Ricky?” said the person he was currently thinking about. It was EJ. He had to pause for a moment to think.

“Yeah?”

“I was wondering…” said EJ, while scratching the back of his head. “Umm… If you would like to-“

“Hey Ricky? Can I borrow you for a few seconds? I need someone to play the piano for the first part. I couldn’t find Ashlyn or Nini anywhere.” asked Kourtney, before heading off to gather everyone else.

“You should probably go.” EJ said, sighing.

“Yeah, I probably should.” said Ricky, while offering an apologetic smile.

Ricky felt really bad leaving EJ hanging like that. He swore to try calling him later that evening. Everything was really hectic. The exams were coming up and not to mention sectionals was a month away. He barely had time to hang out with Gina and Big Red as often, or with anyone for that matter. He really wanted to relax this weekend. He was already ahead with his requirements so it would be no big deal. Maybe he could ask Big Red if they could have a gaming marathon at his house for the weekend. _Yeah. That would be fun._

He still had to stay at school for a few more hours, he had people who pay him to tutor them in piano. He requested that they use the piano in the Choir Room though, so he made sure to ask Ms. Jenn that morning for access to said room. When he finished he packed up his stuff, got paid and went home.

“So how was school today?” said his Dad, as Ricky arrived home.

“Tiring, but fun.” Ricky replied.

“We’ll have spaghetti and meatballs tonight for dinner. Is that alright?”

“Are you kidding? After this long week, I’ve been longing for any type of decent food. I’ll go change upstairs first okay?”

“Don’t be long!”

He quickly threw all his things on the bed and quickly changed. When he finished, he quickly went downstairs to eat. His dad shared his day to him, and he did the same. He was happy that his dad was happy, he wonders how he goes on without mom. The day they found out that mom was dating a different guy, his dad was moping around and not doing any work. His dad literally took two weeks off, just lurking at home. He knew that nothing was going to happen if they kept this up, so he made sure to put on a mask. He was as depressed as his father was learning about the news, but if no one was going to take a stand, then they both would never move on. So Ricky had to be strong for both of them, he told dad to stop moping around and get back out there. Mom wasn’t coming back, and Ricky had to be okay with that. His father needed a smile and not a frown to finally get going.

He woke up in the morning and checked his phone. It was 2PM, he didn’t realize he was that exhausted to have woken up so late the following day. It was Saturday, and they usually did the chores on Sunday mornings so it wasn’t such a big deal. While looking at his phone, he realized he forgot to call EJ last night, and decided to do just that. He quickly unlocked it and went to his contacts to find EJ’s number. When he was about to press the call button, his phone made a noise. He almost dropped it in shock. He quickly answered without checking who it was.

“Hello?” Ricky said.

“Hey Ricky?” EJ said. “Did I umm… call at a bad time? Are you… busy?”

“Not at all” Ricky replied.

“Oh… Cool, Umm… Can I ask you something?”

“Sure, anything.”

“I was wondering… if you were interested in… maybe eating at… Breadstix… some time?”

“Oh. Yeah, why not? How’s tomorrow evening?”

“Yeah that works.” There was a tiny whisper of ‘yes!’ on the other line. “I can pick you up at 6PM?”

“Yup that’s okay. Who else will be going?”

“Oh… Umm… I was hoping it was just going to be the two of us? I mean if that’s okay with you? If not, then you can invite anyone you want.” EJ started rambling.

“Oh.” _Wait is this what I think it is?_ Ricky thought. He felt himself blush.

There was a silent groan before EJ said “I guess I could invite Carlos to come.”

“No, no, you don’t have to.” Ricky face palmed himself. “I didn’t realize what you were asking me.”

“Oh.” There was an awkward silence.

“Hey EJ?”

“Yeah?”

“I most definitely would love to.” Ricky couldn’t help but smile. EJ was asking him out. On a date. Yeah he might have caught on to it too slow, but at least he figured it out.

“Great!” EJ exclaimed. “So I’ll see you at 6?”

“Of course. See you then!”

“Bye Ricky!”

“Bye!” He heard EJ running away and shouting ‘He said yes!’ repeatedly. Ricky felt so many butterflies in his stomach. He felt like he could burst. He quickly ended the call and squealed at the top of his lungs. He had a date.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm writing EJ as if he were Finn, they're both tall and somewhat goofy so i guess it makes sense.  
> Finn always stood up and took charge, he was the 'leader' so it would make sense for EJ here to take the lead as well.
> 
> anyways, ill start working on chap 11 which will be their date at breadstix, so stay tuned! :3  
> and again, happy holidays!


	11. First Experiences

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello everyone! how is everyone doing :3
> 
> chap 11 is here! this one's longer than usual.  
> i will start on chap 12 this week, so watch out for that.
> 
> so here's ricky and ej's first date! enjoy :D

**EJ’s POV**

EJ was restless. It was currently 5PM. He was too early. EJ couldn’t help but be excited for tonight. He was able to ask Carlos for opinions on what to wear though. Carlos settled on a green checkered long-sleeved polo for his top and regular jeans, he said that the green will make his eyes pop. He wasn’t a fashion expert so he had to take Carlos’ word for it. He took a shower at 3PM and probably took too long to fix his hair.

“EJ! You’ve been there for more than an hour!” Carlos exclaimed, shouting at the door.

“Alright, I’m almost done!” he said. When he felt somewhat presentable he finally opened the door to look at Carlos.

“That took an hour?”

“I want everything to be perfect okay?”

“Just be you, knucklehead.” Carlos said. “I’m pretty sure Ricky likes you enough to not care about what you wear or how you look tonight.”

EJ couldn’t help but smile. This was probably the first date he’s ever been nervous for. Nini set him up with plenty of girls last year, but none of them seemed to spark. The phone call yesterday was probably as nerve-wrecking, though ever since that was finished, he’s had jitters till this very evening. He left home at 4:30PM, even though Carlos literally kept reminding him that Ricky’s house wasn’t too far away. He thought driving to Ricky’s house would help ease the nervousness, but every mile he drove made him shake even more. He remembered his phone ringing a few times during the drive, so he took it out to check.

_Gina waved at you._

Gina: hey caswell! i heard youre taking ricky out on a date tonight

Gina: i just want you to know

Gina: if i ever see ricky cry cause you broke his heart or smthin

Gina: i will literally murder you

Gina: 😊

EJ just stared at his phone. He actually got a death threat from Gina. He quickly typed back a reply, words that literally came first to his mind.

EJ: i would never

He was lucky enough that Ricky agreed to go on this date. He honestly thought it was only himself who felt this way. But even if that were the case, he doesn’t have the heart to do that to Ricky. Never.

Gina: good

Gina: just checking 😊

Someone started knocking at his window. It was a man. He signaled him to roll down his windows, which EJ immediately followed.

“You want to wait inside?” the man said.

“Sure… Um…”

“Oh, I’m Ricky’s father by the way.” he said, offering his hand to shake.

“Oh. Mr. Bowen. I’m EJ.” EJ took some time to process that information before quickly taking his hand. He invited him in one more time, to which EJ agreed. He turned off his car and checked his phone one more time. It was 5:45PM. Only a few more minutes. He followed Ricky’s dad to the living room where he invited him to sit.

“So EJ. EJ right?”

“Yes sir! EJ Caswell sir.”

“Any hobbies or interests?”

“Oh, um… singing, playing football, guitar.”

“You met Ricky at that Glee Club then?”

“Yes sir.”

“Well he’s been happier ever since.” said Mr. Bowen, to which EJ just nodded in agreement. He paused. “So where do you plan on going this evening?“

“Oh, umm... just this restaurant downtown called ‘Breadstix’.”

“Fine place, I’m sure. Heard it from our neighbors here.” EJ didn’t know what to say. He was trying to make a good impression, but he also didn’t want to say anything he might regret. There was an awkward silence, until Ricky’s dad started talking again.

“Listen here.” Mr. Bowen said, while looking at EJ straight in the eyes. “Ricky doesn’t really go out often. He does with friends but never like this.” EJ nodded.

“I just want to make sure that you’ll treat him right okay? He’s my only son, and all I want is the best for him, whatever makes him happy.”

“Of course sir.”

“I may not have been around this town for very long, but I know people. So make sure that Ricky stays happy, you understand that?”

“Yes sir.”

“Dad, don’t scare him away.” said a voice coming from the stairway. It was Ricky. He was wearing a blue long-sleeved shirt and blue ripped jeans. He must have heard his exchange with his father, since he was giggling as he walked down the steps. _Gosh he’s so cute._ EJ thought. He felt so many butterflies in his stomach. Nini was right. Ricky was special. He never felt this way around other people.

“You ready to go?” Ricky said, smiling at him.

“Um… yeah, all set!” EJ was so happy. He makes a mental note to thank Nini and Carlos for talking to him and giving him the strength to finally ask Ricky out.

“Bring him home by ten-thirty EJ, you understand? No later than that.”

“Yes sir.” said EJ, before walking through the front door.

“Bye Dad!” Ricky said, while giving his father a hug.

“Don’t stay out too late!”

EJ ran to his car and opened the door to the passenger’s seat. Ricky offered him a ‘thank you’ and got in. He quickly ran to the other side and started the engine. Before driving he took out a rose from the backseat.

“Awww… EJ.” said Ricky, before taking a whiff of the flower. EJ just gushed and started driving. They barely talked on the way to the restaurant, which may have been a bad sign. The silence was deafening and EJ really wanted to face palm himself so bad. When they finally arrived, Ricky cleared his throat.

“Look EJ, I’m nervous too, okay? This is actually my first ever date.” EJ felt like he was ruining this for Ricky. EJ was ruining Ricky’s first experience. That thought alone gave EJ the courage to finally speak.

“I’m sorry the drive here wasn’t at all great.”

“It’s okay, the date has just started right?”

“Yeah, umm...” EJ took quickly opened his door to walk to Ricky’s side and open it for him. Ricky smiled at him again, before walking out of the car. He locked the car and immediately walked with Ricky to the restaurant’s doors.

“Seat for two please?” said Ricky to one of the waiters.

The waiter led them to the only seats available. EJ felt bad again. He didn’t think of getting a reservation. Ricky must noticed his face.

“Hey, it’s okay.” said Ricky. They both sat opposite to one another.

“Look, let me start this thing over.” EJ said, sighing. He shook off the jitters. He has got to fix this. He cleared his throat. “Ricky, you look amazing tonight by the way.”

“Not so bad yourself.”

“Yeah, Carlos may get offended if you thought it looked bad.”

“You actually asked Carlos for help?” said Ricky, while laughing.

“Well, I wanted everything to be perfect.” EJ said, his face dropping.

“Hey, it still is.” said Ricky, reaching out for his hand. EJ felt his cheeks redden. Ricky’s hand was right above his own. He never really noticed how soft Ricky’s hands were. He never thought about actually holding hands, and right at that moment that’s what filled his thoughts. Ricky offered him a reassuring smile.

“So what can I get for you two?” the waitress who approached them said. Handing them both a menu.

“I’ll have the pesto pasta.” Ricky said, after deciding. He looked at EJ, asking what he wanted. EJ simply said that he’ll take the same order. His mind was buzzing and he couldn’t think straight. The waitress took note of it and left them alone.

“So EJ, I heard you were taking dance lessons from Carlos.”

“Yeah, Ms. Jenn practically begged him to take me as a student.”

“Surprised she didn’t include me.”

“I don’t think you dance that bad.”

“Oh really?”

“Did you forget that one time I accidentally hit Nini in the face while doing one of the dance routines? Gina was practically giving me death glares for the whole week.” Ricky laughed, while remembering it. EJ swears he can listen to Ricky’s laugh all day. “My dancing could probably kill, that’s how bad it is.” he said, while smiling at Ricky, quite possibly losing his breath from laughing.

“Okay fine you win.” said Ricky, tearing up.

“Maybe we can practice together some time?” said EJ, after the laughter died down. He was feeling a lot braver ever since they got here.

“Yeah sure, why not.”

EJ noticed Ricky started shivering as time passed by. He looked above them, and saw that the air conditioner was facing directly at them. He excused himself and quickly walked to his car. He returned and offered Ricky his varsity jacket. It actually never leaves the car, EJ always had it with him. Ricky took it and said thanks before putting it on. It was too big for Ricky. The sleeves even went over his hands. Ricky just wrapped himself in it, obviously comfortable, and EJ couldn’t help but stare at his jacket on him.

The food arrived shortly after and they started eating. EJ noticed Ricky immediately going after the garlic bread that came along with the pasta. He just smiled. He grabbed his own and attempted to feed it to Ricky. He honestly didn’t think Ricky would go along with it, but when Ricky noticed he actually took a bite from his piece. They just laughed at each other. They soon talked more about the glee club, the exams, and even the upcoming football game.

“The rest of the team is still hard on us. But we’ll manage.” said EJ, when Ricky asked if their situation got any better.

“Won’t it affect the team’s dynamics?”

“I don’t think so? Everyone in the team is still professional when it comes to actual practices and games. I don’t think their grudges are going to get in the way.”

They chatted the rest of the evening. It got better. EJ was worried that their awkward start may have ruined it, but it was all fine now. It was working out.

Time soon came and it was already 10PM. The night seemed too short. He still wanted to spend more time with Ricky. Though to avoid getting on Mr. Bowen’s bad side, EJ had to bring Ricky home. The ride to Ricky’s was less awkward than the ride to the restaurant. They listened to music on the way home, with Ricky and EJ alternating song choices. They sang their hearts out to each tune. When they eventually arrived, EJ really wished he had more time.

“Thanks for tonight EJ.” said Ricky.

“I’d say you saved it, I was pretty much skin and bones on the way there.” said EJ, referring to how silent he was at the start.

“Well, let’s say it was a team effort.”

“Sure thing.” They both laughed. He never wants to stop having moments like this with Ricky.

“No really… Thanks for taking me on my first date.” said Ricky, with a wide smile.

_Honestly, you deserve it._ Thought EJ. And that was the truth. Ricky was a great guy. EJ was the one thankful that he got to go on a date with him.

“Awww…”

“Wait, I said that out loud?” said EJ. Ricky just laughed at him.

Just then, the lights on Ricky’s porch suddenly started flickering. He questioned Ricky if there was something wrong with their lights, to which Ricky just sighed in reply.

“That’s my dad.” said Ricky. “I guess I have to go.”

“Yeah, I guess.” His face dropped. Guess that’s the end of the date.

“Hey… EJ?”

“Yeah?” said EJ, without turning his head. Then it happened. He felt Ricky press a kiss on his cheek. As quick as it came, it was gone. Ricky ran inside of the house. All EJ could do was touch his cheek, right where the kiss landed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> someone got kissed on the cheek :3
> 
> and another someone, forgot to return a jacket :3
> 
> anyways that was chap 11, i hope you all liked it  
> school will be starting this week so the updates will be slower, and probably will start posting on weekends.  
> i will finish this story tho, so hope you all stay tuned. :D


	12. Late Mornings

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello everyone!!!
> 
> school work is starting to pile up on me again  
> so ill be trying to make the updates a bi-weekly thing meaning ill also update this coming weekend
> 
> for the meantime enjoy chap 12

**Ricky’s POV**

Ricky opened his eyes to see light at his window. Last night was just amazing. He slept with contentment with how happy he was. He still can’t believe that EJ asked him out. The whole Sunday morning was him video calling Big Red and Gina asking for advice. He may have seemed to be relaxed more than EJ was, but in reality his heart was beating furiously throughout the whole date. It all went well in the end. Ricky let out a sigh, while remembering.

His phone suddenly made a noise. He quickly grabbed it and soon realized he had lots of texts from Big Red. He unlocked his phone and opened his messages.

Big Red: dude where are you?

Big Red: its already 8!

Big Red: ms sanchez is already here

Big Red: she already checked the attendance L

Ricky’s eyes immediately stared at the corner of his screen. It was 8:30AM. He was supposed to have a presentation today. He quickly jumped up and ran to the bathroom. He sped through his morning routine. Once he finished taking a bath and brushing his teeth he quickly got changed. He grabbed the first jacket he could see, which was already on his bed. He shrugged it on and raced downstairs to take an apple off the kitchen counter. He didn’t see his dad, so he must have already been at work. Ricky’s father usually had to be at work before 6AM, so Ricky had to set alarms so he could wake himself up. The alarms didn’t seem to wake him up today for some reason.

Ricky ran to school, which lucky for him wasn’t too far away from home. When he finally arrived and walked through McKinley’s doors he made a beeline directly to his classroom. He felt eyes staring at him. Thinking it was football jocks planning to slushie him that morning, he quickened his pace. When he finally arrived to his class, he immediately apologized to his teacher. Ms. Sanchez told him she’ll move his presentation next week, with corresponding deductions. He accepted her instruction and turned to look at the class.

Everyone was staring at him. He was nearly an hour late, so it was natural to receive stares, Ricky thought. He walked to his seat beside Big Red and greeted him. Big Red was also sending him weird looks, but didn’t say anything. The next few periods were somewhat similar. He noticed some people giggle at him, but he chose to ignore them. _Aren’t these people tired of picking on the new kid?_

He left his last class and made his way down the hallway for lunch. He received more glares, but he shrugged them off, he was somewhat getting frustrated. On the way to the bleachers, he met up with Gina and Big Red.

“So I take it the date went well?” asked Gina, with a smirk on her face.

“It really did… This day isn’t going great though.”

“Why’s that?”

“Everyone’s been staring at me since first period.” said Ricky, with a sad face.

“Why wouldn’t they? You’re wearing your boyfriend’s varsity jacket”

“Boyfriend?” Ricky said, looking at Gina. “What do yo-“ Ricky stopped walking. He slowly looked down at what he was wearing. He felt his cheeks redden at the sudden realization. He quickly zipped it open to take it off. But then he realized how cold it was outside school, he sighed then put it back on. He was able to get a whiff of it. It smelled like honey and cinnamon, which helped calm him down a bit.

“Let’s just go.” Ricky put his hands in the front pockets and made sure to stare at the ground the rest of the way. He can’t believe he didn’t realize. It was too big on him, though some of his jackets were oversized, so he may have assumed that this was one of his.

“Oh my god.” said Carlos, covering his mouth. It didn’t help that the rest of the glee club also started hanging out there. There were more eyes to stare down at him. Ricky looked up to see everyone looking at his direction. He quickly sat down at the nearest step to avoid eye contact, before realizing that EJ wasn’t even there yet. _Does he know? Is he angry at me?_ Ricky’s mind was filled with worry and guilt.

EJ and Nini arrived shortly, the former holding an ice bag to his eye. It turns out EJ got in a fight with one of the jocks, teasing him about ‘nailing the new kid’. When he met EJ’s eyes he couldn’t help but start crying. The skin around his left eye already starting to darken. He quickly ran to EJ to give him a hug. He felt tears already flowing as he held onto him for dear life.

“I am so sorry.” said Ricky, crying into EJ’s chest. “I was in such a rush this morning that I didn’t realize what I was wearing. I thought I was wearing one of my jackets. Everyone kept staring at me the whole day, and I was too dumb to realize. You even got hurt because of me. I’m sorry EJ.” rambled Ricky, taking deep breaths. He felt overwhelmed. He tightened his hold on EJ, hoping he wasn’t too angry at him.

Ricky felt EJ hug him back. “Shh… Ricky don’t cry.” He put some space between them so he could look at Ricky’s face. EJ then started trying to wipe Ricky’s tears away. “Hey… It’s okay. I’m not upset.” When Ricky finally calmed down, they both faced all their friends.

“I guess everyone’s wondering what happened.” said EJ, receiving nods from the others. “We just had our first date. I lent my jacket to Ricky, because it was cold at the restaurant and he accidentally wore it to school. That’s it.” he explained.

“I guess that’s not how everyone else sees it.” Ashlyn spoke up. “We’re going to have to tell others that Ricky borrowed the jacket, to get everyone off your backs.” Everyone agreed and said they’ll start telling other people. They truly had the best set of friends. Always willing to help each other out.

“Thank you so much you guys!” EJ said. When everyone's voices settled down, Cayden suddenly spoke up.

“So, you and Ricky huh?” He asked, to which EJ nodded. Ricky felt bad, he practically outed them both to all their friends, and he didn’t even know if EJ was ready for that. He took a glance at EJ to see his reaction, which EJ caught. He offered Ricky a reassuring smile and a gentle squeeze to the hand.

“Well congratulations, you two!” Cayden said, before coming up to hug EJ then Ricky afterwards. Nini took her turn to hug both of them before shouting out ‘Group Hug!’. Everyone else started coming down from the bleachers to encase them both in a huge embrace. All of their friends supported them, and Ricky couldn’t help but smile for the first time today.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> who do you guys want to hug more?  
> sad/guilty ricky or black-eyed ej
> 
> that aside, the varsity jacket's in this story have the owner's surname printed on the back  
> so the whole school could literally read "caswell" behind ricky for the whole day
> 
> hope you all liked this chapter.  
> will be working on chap 13 soon, so stay tuned for that!
> 
> p.s. ill be changing chuck's name to riko/rico in the previous chapters since i realized thats the name they used in the series  
> (ill probably go with riko to keep it apart from the actor's real name)


	13. Study Week

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hsmtmts season 1 has ended :(  
> the wait for season 2 has begun! <3
> 
> until then i'll have to listen to the soundtrack to motivate me to finish this story :)
> 
> anyways chap 13 is up! hope you all like it!

**EJ’s POV**

It felt like time was moving faster. The exams were next week, which meant that Sectionals was just around the corner. They pretty much had their set list ready and everyone was just pumped. EJ had their first football game this Friday and he made sure to invite everyone in the glee club to watch. Everyone being so supportive, obviously agreed and said they would attend.

He and Ricky agreed to take it slow. That didn’t stop their friends from referring to them as ‘Caswen’. Which Nini explained was their ship name. It was like ‘Gini’, which was theirs.

She and Gina sort of went on their first date. Gina invited Ricky, while Nini invited EJ. EJ knew that Nini and Gina were obviously trying to make it a friends thing instead of a date. He told Ricky they should ditch them when they get to the cinema, to which Ricky was worried Gina might get mad at him. EJ laughed and explained that Gina might thank them both instead of shouting at them. Gina started spamming Ricky with messages asking them where they were, but after a few minutes she stopped texting. He took Ricky out to Starbucks as they both waited for the movie to finish. An hour later, Ricky’s phone buzzed.

Gina: thanks

Ricky: it was actually ej’s idea

Gina: tell caswell i owe him one

Ricky gave his phone to EJ as he went to the barista to take their drinks. EJ just laughed out loud, and told Ricky about Nini having a crush on Gina. Ricky was shocked, and explained that Gina told him about her feelings too. EJ texted Nini where they were, and soon they saw them both holding hands while walking. Both with big smiles on their faces. EJ was glad that Nini was happy with Gina, and the fact that Nini didn’t need a bodyguard from slushies anymore since Gina would be by her side.

It was currently Tuesday night, and Ricky invited EJ over so they could study together. He parked the car at the driveway and grabbed his things. When he reached the door, Ricky’s father greeted him.

“Hey EJ! Ricky’s upstairs in his room, just head up there.”

“Sure thing Mr. Bowen.”

“I told you to drop the formalities, it makes me feel old. Just call me Mike.” EJ nodded. He’s been here at Ricky’s house a lot recently, so Ricky’s father was already used to having him around. “Dinner will be ready by 8 okay? Be sure to tell Ricky.”

“Will do.” EJ proceeded to head up to Ricky’s room. He opened the door without knocking, and saw that Ricky was still in the midst of putting on a shirt. He silently closed the door and quickly turned around. EJ felt his cheeks redden at the realization that he was actually staring for a moment before he closed back the door. Ricky probably didn’t see him since he had his back turned. He knocked after a few seconds.

“Come in!”

“Hey Ricky!” Ricky immediately came up to him to give him a hug and a kiss on the cheek, and EJ couldn’t help but smile. That’s the farthest they’ve gone so far. EJ didn’t want to push Ricky to do something he wasn’t ready to do. He was happy with getting to spend time with Ricky, and that was enough for him.

They quickly settled down and started opening books. They sat there silently reading up on their lessons, both content and happy. They would sometimes take a break and play music, both of them just jamming and singing to all of the tunes. EJ would say it a billion times, but he just can’t get over the fact of how lucky he was that he was dating Ricky. He’s had flings before, but the moment Ricky bumped into him on the first day, it actually feels like he was on the right track. Like this was where he was meant be.

Soon enough it was 8PM and they both went downstairs to the dining table. Ricky’s father was already there waiting for them. EJ understood how it must have been being a single parent. His mom was a single parent for many years, and they both turned out alright. Ricky was lucky to have a supportive father by his side. EJ never asked Ricky about his mom, but he didn’t seem mind that it was only him and his dad all the time.

“So how’s school been?” Mr. Bowen asked, while they were eating.

“Great! Exams are next week so the homeworks and projects have been piling up.” Ricky said. He paused then smiled. “Also we’re all set for Sectionals! We’ve got the songs, singing and even the choreography down!”

“That’s coming up aye? Well make sure to get me a ticket to watch.” Mr. Bowen said, smiling at Ricky. He then turned to EJ. “I heard the football season is starting? When’s the big game?”

“It’s this Friday. We’re playing on our home turf, so hopefully everything goes well.” EJ answered.

“I’ll say. Ricky here is probably as excited for it as you are. He’s already started making those big signs to cheer you guys on.” Ricky coughed and gently hit his dad on the arm.

“Dad! That was supposed to be a surprise!” Ricky shouted, though hardly upset. EJ couldn’t help but laugh. He happily glanced at Ricky, and the boy was blushing till they finished dinner. Soon enough, when they finished eating, EJ helped clean up the table. When Ricky said that they’ll head back upstairs to study, Mr. Bowen told EJ he could stay over, since they weren’t done yet. EJ accepted the offer, and called his mom to ask for permission, which she happily granted. Luckily he had brought extra clothes he could wear the next day.

Ricky and EJ both headed back up to Ricky’s room. Ricky got a small bed and an extra pillow EJ could use for the night. Ricky set them on the floor next to his bed. EJ got his stuff and settled down on the bed he gave. Ricky climbed up his own bed and gave EJ another kiss on the cheek before they started. EJ just smiled at him and opened his own book. They continued like this, till EJ heard soft snoring coming from Ricky. He smiled as he admired Ricky’s features. Ricky was probably the cutest boy he’s ever met.

He searched for a blanket he could cover Ricky with, but couldn’t find any. A red jacket that was hanging from the chair near Ricky’s computer caught his eye. EJ felt himself smile. Ricky has probably returned his varsity jacket a thousand times, and eventually borrowed it when he forgot to wear one to school. So much so, that EJ made sure to bring an extra jacket for himself. EJ knows Ricky might be doing it on purpose, but he’d admit that he was completely fine with it. He loved seeing Ricky in his jacket. It would always engulf him, since it was way too big. He grabbed it and used it to cover Ricky up. The boy immediately hugged at the fabric and held it close to himself. _He’s so freaking cute._ EJ thought. He quickly took out his phone and took a photo. EJ smiled and set it as his new lock screen. He felt euphoric as he settled on his own bed and closed his eyes with content. _Goodnight Ricky._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the ending part was sort of requested by one of my friends so shoutout to him! <3
> 
> next chapter will be this wednesday maybe and will be about ej's football game
> 
> so until then, hope you all stay tuned! :3


	14. Fallen Titan

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chap 14 is here!!
> 
> it's EJ's football game!
> 
> sorry if there are mistakes with regards to how football is played  
> i dont really know much about the sport, so this is my best effort to write a game
> 
> hope you all enjoy! <3

**Ricky’s POV**

The bleachers were filled as the game was about to commence. Ricky sat with the rest of the glee club. Everyone except Cayden, Riko, EJ and Gina was there. Gina was currently at the side of the field warming up with the rest of the Cheerios. She waved at all of them, and blew a kiss for Nini. Nini just blushed and made a gesture as if she caught Gina’s air kiss. _Those two are too cute for words._ Ricky thought.

Ricky made sure to give each of them glee kids a sign that he made. Each one was a big piece to form a whole sign saying ‘Go McKinley Titans!’ in red and white. Ricky worked on it the whole week. He wanted to show his support to his friends in the football team, Cayden and Riko, and of course EJ. It was supposed to be a surprise but his dad had to spoil it.

The drums started pounding, signaling the players to enter the field. They all cheered as each titan started to make their way to their marks. When Ricky finally spotted EJ, he shouted at the top of his lungs, catching his attention. EJ then removed his helmet to wave at all of them, with a big grin on his face. Ricky smiled and shouted ‘Go EJ!’ while holding up a sign that said ‘5 is <3’, which made the other boy smirk. It was EJ’s jersey number. Ricky was able to ask Riko during the weekend, making Riko laugh after he realized what Ricky was asking it for.

“Ricky chill! The game hasn’t even started yet!” Kourtney said. Everyone just laughed at how giddy Ricky was being.

“Sorry, first game I’ve been to. Okay?” said Ricky, holding his hands up in defense.

One of the referees suddenly blew his whistle. The game has started. McKinley was first on offense. EJ started shouting out numbers before he said ‘hut!’. The ball was given to EJ and he stepped back looking for a good throw. His teammates trying their best to block for him. When EJ finally got a clear view, he threw it to his farthest teammate scoring them the first touchdown. Everyone started screaming. The game was off to a good start.

The whole game was literally Ricky shouting and getting over excited. His voice overpowering everyone from the glee club. Nini was screaming along with him too, but not loud enough to beat Ricky. Everyone else just gave him amusing stares.

“I swear he wouldn’t be this excited if my cousin wasn’t in the team” said Ashlyn, with a knowing smirk. Ricky couldn’t help but blush, affirming Ashlyn’s statement.

“Hey! I’m here for Cayden and Riko too!” Ricky retorted, desperately trying to fight the red in his cheeks.

“Mhmm” said Kourtney.

“EJ’s number one fan, right here!” shouted Natalie, cupping her hands around her mouth for emphasis.

“Hey! You’re watching the game for Cayden too.” said Ricky, referring to Natalie. He was trying his best to divert the attention. The butterflies in his stomach were going wild.

“True, but she’s not the one using up all the oxygen to cheer.” said Carlos.

Ricky was probably as red as a tomato, because everyone just burst out laughing. He decided to keep quiet for minutes after that. His friends giggling at his reaction. However, his decision to go silent was immediately forgotten after a few minutes, and he soon started cheering again.

The game was approaching halftime, with McKinley in the lead. The crowd was going wild. The McKinley Titans were winning their first game, which might set the course for the rest of the season.

When the whistle blew once again, Ricky sneaked his way to the entrance of the locker room. He hid and waited until the rest of the team passed before he pulled EJ to the side and immediately gave him a kiss on the cheek. EJ smiled and gave Ricky a hug.

“Someone’s a little too excited for the first game.” said EJ, referring to him.

“I’m simply cheering for the good-looking quarterback” said Ricky, with a smirk.

“Which one?” EJ said, giving Ricky an upset look, obviously playing along with his tease. Ricky just laughed and hugged EJ tighter. He still can’t believe he was actually dating EJ. Who would have thought that the first guy he meets at this school, would actually be his first. “I need to go. Coach is probably looking for me.” Ricky just nodded with a fake sad face. EJ simply grinned and kissed him on the forehead before rushing into the locker room.

When Ricky returned to the bleachers, everyone gave him a knowing look. Everyone except Big Red that is.

“Dude did you go to the comfort room? I literally had to go, and asked you to come with, just a few minutes ago.” said Big Red. Everyone’s eyes diverted to Big Red. Ashlyn quickly whispered something into his ear. “Seriously, you couldn’t wait until the game was over?” The rest of the group just laughed at Big Red’s reaction.

“Caswell’s got you whipped boy!” Gina said, sitting right next to Nini. Earning another round of laughs from everyone. Ricky felt his cheeks redden again. The McKinley marching band were the ones currently taking the field, which meant the Cheerios were taking their break.

A few moments later the band finished their last song, and the fields were filled with football players once again. Gina kissed Nini goodbye, before heading back down to the field shortly after.

Before the second half started, Ricky told everyone from the glee club to raise their boards and they all cheered their loudest. EJ just stared at them, shocked at Ricky’s effort with the signs. Ricky just beamed proudly. Ricky noticed EJ wasn’t the only one looking at them though. One of his teammates was also staring at them, not with a smile, but with a sneer. It freaked Ricky out.

The whistle blew, starting the second half. The opposing team was catching up. That’s when the crowd started getting agitated. Everyone was suddenly shouting, since the team lost its momentum. EJ kept getting tackled before he could throw the ball. Their coach was shouting at them literally pissed at how the game has progressed. Soon enough the enemy team gained a five-point lead.

The clock on the screen indicating two minutes left of game time. McKinley Titans were on offense. This was their last chance. They needed a touchdown to surpass the enemy team and win the game. The crowd was silent. The whistle blew and the ball was passed to EJ. Time seemed to slow down at that moment.

EJ was backing up trying to avoid tackles from left and right.

There was one coming from his blind side, and EJ didn’t see it. One of EJ’s teammates came rushing towards the tackler.

His teammate was only a few inches from stopping the attacker. But then, the player suddenly slowed down his pace.

Ricky just stared in shock as EJ was tackled to the ground. The loud horn coming from the scoreboard, signaling the end of the game.

The Titans lost.

Everyone around the glee club started shouting at EJ. Saying it was his fault. Ricky looked toward the field, at EJ. He was fighting with one of his teammates. They were pushing one another. Their coach started running toward them and to stop the fight. The coach then turned his attention to EJ and started shouting at him. EJ just took of his helmet and threw it to the ground. He started heading towards the locker room.

Ricky ran down towards the entrance trying to catch up to EJ. The hallway was dark and all he could see was a silhouette walking towards him. It was him.

“Hey!” said Ricky trying to catch EJ. He just kept walking ignoring Ricky. There were tears in EJ’s eyes. “Hey… hey… it’s okay.” Ricky ran up towards him to give him a hug. EJ pulled away trying to hide his tears.

“I’m sorry Ricky. But I really just need to be alone right now.” EJ said, before walking away. Ricky felt his own eyes start to sting, as he watched EJ slowly fade from his view.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> EJ deserves so many hugs after this chapter... :(  
> dont you all agree?
> 
> also this is their first game of the season, so if im not mistaken  
> they still have 2 losses before they're out
> 
> chap 15 will be this weekend so stay tuned! :3


	15. Loud Whispers

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hellooooooooo! :D  
> this chapter will be a depressing one so bear with me
> 
> this takes place the weekend after the game, where EJ immediately goes home right after.
> 
> anyways, without further ado, here's chap 15! :D

**EJ’s POV**

EJ felt depressed. He couldn’t face anyone. Not at school, or even at home. He stayed in his room for the whole weekend. No contact whatsoever. He didn’t touch his phone to check messages or answer calls. He’s heard it buzzing for hours on end. EJ would just cover his ears pretending it wasn’t. It would stop buzzing after a while.

There was a knock at the door.

“EJ? I know you’re probably still not ready to talk… but at least eat something. Don’t starve yourself.” said Carlos.

He heard Carlos place the food tray on the floor. He made sure to wait for a few minutes just to make sure his stepbrother would actually leave and wouldn’t force him to talk. Once Carlos was gone, he opened the door. He saw three trays of food already at his doorstep. Two were there since the morning and afternoon. He took the tray that Carlos placed down and immediately closed and locked his door. He slid his back against his door until he was sitting on the floor. He looked at the tray of food in his hand. His mouth watered. He placed it on the floor and begun to hungrily eat all the food up. He then quickly drank the water that came with it.

After he finished, he looked around his room. It was a mess. There were clothes strewn about. The things on his desk were on the floor. His mattress was grazing the floor. And there were dents all over the walls. He looked at his hands. His knuckles were dark red. Both hands were full of bruises. He brought both of them back at his eyes, as he felt them sting once again. His mind was filled with emotions of anger, regret, guilt, depression, and rage. He hated himself. He felt worthless. He started pounding his head, until he felt tears flow from his eyes. He brought both his knees to his chest and leaned on them. He thought his eyes were already dried up. All out of tears. He was wrong.

The McKinley Titans lost because of him. At least that’s what the voices in his head kept telling him. That’s what the voices were screaming at him last night. That’s what his coach shouted right at his face, right before he ran to the locker rooms to hide in embarrassment. Ricky tried to talk to him. But all the voices kept overpowering him and he felt like he could explode. He didn’t want Ricky to be around when that happened. He changed as quickly as he could and then ran to his car. Once he got inside, he banged his hands on the steering wheel repeatedly. He felt his whole body shake. He controlled his breathing and started his engine. He drove as fast as he could. He was way above the speed limit, but he didn’t care. He wanted to go home, and get to his room, where he could let go of everything he’s been holding in since the moment the buzzer sounded, signaling their loss. And that’s exactly what he did.

EJ’s eyes were suddenly drawn attention to the light creeping through his window. It was morning. He didn’t know what day it was. It felt like he’s been in his room for a year. He suddenly heard a knock on his door.

“EJ? I’m glad you ate your dinner… Umm… It’s Monday by the way… Everyone in glee club really wants to talk to you and see if you’re okay.” said Carlos, before pausing to wait for a reply. EJ didn’t say anything. He felt like his throat was dry. He didn’t have any words to give anyways.

“Nini and Ashlyn has been calling asking about you.” said Carlos. He felt worthless enough losing their game. His friends were worried about him, the least he could do is let them know.

“Tell them I’m fine.” EJ said. His voice was hoarse. “I’m not ready to face anyone yet though.”

“Oh…” Carlos was probably shocked that he actually got an answer. “Ricky’s been visiting since Saturday morning. He really misses you.” He missed Ricky too. But he just couldn’t. Ricky deserved better than the loser he’s become. “Anyways… If you really don’t want to go, I won’t force you… I’ll go ahead okay?” He heard Carlos’ footsteps fade away. He missed his friends. Should he try to go today?

His body made his decision for him. He moved to the shower and bathed his aching body. He changed and headed downstairs. There was food at the dining table. A note right by it from his mother.

‘EJ sweetie, if you’re reading this then you’re probably out of your room. I’m glad that you’re okay. You should take this day to rest. I know you haven’t been doing that since the game. I’ll be going to the grocery and I’ll be back by 10AM. I want to talk to you. I know it’s only been two days, but I miss your face. - Mom’

EJ felt a tear from his eyes. He didn’t deserve his family either. He was just a loser that’s never getting anywhere in life. He thought he was on the right road. He’s been wrong all along. He grabbed an apple from the counter and headed to his car. The drive to school was silent. There wasn’t any traffic. Once he reached McKinley he parked his car, and stared at the entrance for what seemed like hours. He eventually got the courage to walk through the doors. The halls were empty. He walked to his first class, which was Biology. It was exam week. Everyone was quietly currently taking theirs. His teacher gave him a pat on the back and gave him a copy of the exam questions.

EJ shuffled his feet until he reached his desk. There he saw Nini focusing on her paper. When he took his seat, Nini stared at him and gave him a soft smile, which he returned. He still wasn’t ready to talk. He felt other eyes stare at him, and heard faint whispers from his classmates. He desperately wanted to get out of there.

A few minutes later, EJ finished his paper and passed it to his teacher. He quickly finished the exam not bothering to review his answers. He didn’t feel like he could talk to Nini. He didn’t know what to say. Nini just stared after him in shock.

This was how the rest of his day went. Everyone kept whispering behind his back. And even though they were only whispering, it sounded loud to EJ’s ears. He knew it was about him. Soon enough, it was already lunch break and his feet had led him to the bleachers, where he saw all his friends sitting. Luckily for him, they hadn’t seen him yet, so it wasn’t too late to retreat. He looked at all his friends. They were laughing. They didn’t need him. His eyes landed on Ricky, who was the only one who wasn’t smiling. EJ missed him so much. He missed hugging him and receiving his kisses. Did he deserve them though?

_No, I don’t. I don’t deserve Ricky._ EJ thought, as he walked away.

He headed to the cafeteria and found an empty table where he could eat. Everyone was staring at him. He wanted so much to make a huge hole on the ground and let it swallow him. The PA System suddenly made a noise, drawing everyone’s attention. EJ finally felt like he could breathe.

**”Good Morning Titans! Exam Week has started, and I personally want to wish you all luck”** said Principal Guiterrez. **“Aside from that, we have an announcement from our Football Coach”** The mic made a thud sound, as it was taken by force.

**“To everyone who was able to watch our first game last Friday, it obviously wasn’t a great sight. But I’ve already made plans that would assure us a win for our next games, and quite possible secure the championship. We do not plan to lose our streak.”** Everyone in the cafeteria started cheering. **“Part of that plan is to require all the football players to commit to the team. I will be starting our practices right after classes, meaning NO extracurricular activities.”** His coach paused.

**“So if you don’t show up right after today’s classes, consider yourself out of the team!”** EJ felt like his coach’s last few words were for him. He could feel the anger from his voice. Whether it was for the whole team or specifically for him, he wasn’t really sure.

There was one thing that was certain. And it immediately plagued his thoughts.

He had to choose between glee club and football.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oh nooo... :(
> 
> the ending scene sort of reflects the storyline from glee  
> so shout out to those who realized that <3
> 
> anyways ill post chap 16 this wednesday so stay tuned for that! :3


	16. Ticking Clock

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chap 16 is hereeee! :D
> 
> so ive decided to finish this story at 20 chapters, meaning ill be done by february
> 
> also, there will be another glee reference right at the beginning for the gleeks so watch out for it :3
> 
> anyways hope you enjoy this chapter!

**Ricky’s POV**

_Tick. Tock. Tick_. _Tock_

Everything was silent. All the eyes were staring at the one thing making noise. The big hand was nearly close to pointing at six. Ms. Jenn eventually joined them as they all stared at the clock. Only a few more seconds.

_Tick. Tock. Tick._

It was 3:30PM. Everyone turned to look at the doorway. There was no one there.

“I guess they’re not coming. I’m really sorry guys.” Ms. Jenn said.

“I can’t believe this. I thought they were our friends. How can they just leave us?” said Kourtney, shaking her head.

“How are we supposed to compete now? We’re down to eight and Sectionals is a week away.” wondered Ashlyn.

While everyone started worrying, Ricky kept his eyes at the door. He was hopeful. They were all at the bleachers when Principal Guiterrez made his announcement. They didn’t hear about it till Ms. Jenn franticly approached Carlos after lunch period, telling him the news. Ricky heard from Nini that EJ went to school that day. So he was listening for EJ’s footsteps, wishing that they’d come.

Suddenly, there were faint steps coming from the hallway. Ricky couldn’t help but smile. They were coming. Two familiar faces came through the door. It was Cayden and Riko. Natalie immediately walked towards Cayden to give him a hug. They all let a sigh of relief, except for Ricky, whose eyes were still glued to the door. Only two came, there wasn’t a third.

“Where’s EJ?” asked Carlos. All their smiles faded, as they realized what had happened. EJ chose football. Ricky felt a tear fall from his eye, as Nini came up to him and held him in a tight embrace. EJ wasn’t coming.

They went on with rehearsals. Everyone wasn’t in the mood. They just lost a friend. Some were disappointed. Some said they understand EJ’s decision. And there were some, who felt like they were living in a nightmare, waiting to wake up. That was Ricky. The last time he saw EJ, it seemed like the boy couldn’t breathe. Ricky wanted to hold him that night. He understood how hard it must have been for him. He wanted to tell EJ that he still had friends and family who loved him. That he shouldn’t listen to what everyone else was saying. That he was there, he will always be there for him. But now, he wonders if he’ll ever get the chance.

Ms. Jenn announced that they’ll have a rehearsal this Friday as well. They had a lot of revamping to do, with the singing and blocking, now that EJ wasn’t joining them. EJ had a duet for the performance. A duet with Ricky. The whole glee club had agreed that both their voices meshed well together, and so did Ms. Jenn. They were going to sing ‘Breaking Free’ from High School Musical as their opening number, and now that EJ was gone, they had to find someone to sing with him. Nini volunteered to fill in, wanting to be there to support Ricky, if ever he couldn’t handle the performance.

He barely saw EJ for the entire week. It felt like his heart was torn from his chest. There were times when he’d see EJ in the hallways, Ricky would offer a smile. But EJ would just drop his face and walk away. He missed EJ so much, that it actually hurt. He had so much emotion built up inside. He needed a way to channel it. He grabbed his blue notebook, and started writing how he felt. He wished that everything had worked out. Wished that it didn’t have to end.

For once after all these years, he actually felt like he belonged. EJ made him feel that way. Now that EJ was gone, Ricky felt like he was lost. He didn’t know where to go or what to do.

When Friday afternoon rolled in, they all gathered in the auditorium. Ms. Jenn suggested they practice on an actual stage, so they could get the feel of it. She instructed Nini and Ricky to perform the duet first, but when the piano started playing the first notes to ‘Breaking Free’, Ricky lost it.

“I’m sorry… I’m still not okay.” said Ricky, tears threatening to fall from his eyes.

“I understand what you’re feeling Ricky, but we’re running out of time to rehearse.” Ms. Jenn, Sectionals was next Wednesday, and although they did have the whole weekend, Ms. Jenn wanted them to take it as time to rest.

“Maybe he just needs a breather?” Nini suggested. Ms. Jenn agreed and let them take a five minute brake. She went to focus on trying to arrange the choreography for their second routine, asking Carlos for his assistance. They still had to fill spaces where EJ was supposed be dancing.

Nini brought him to the piano to sit down. Ashlyn just excused herself to give them some space.

“I’m sorry… I just really thought I could do this.” Ricky said.

“Hey… It’s okay… I miss him too.” said Nini, reassuring him.

“We all do.” They both turned around to see who spoke. It was Gina. Ricky offered a weak smile, appreciating how his friends were trying to cheer him up. Gina leaned in to give Nini a hug and a kiss on the cheek. Ricky looked away, knowing that those simple gestures and gentle touches would remind him of what had passed.

“I know it’s stupid but… I sort of wrote a song while trying to clear my thoughts.” said Ricky, with a soft nervous laugh.

“It’s not stupid at all! I write songs whenever I feel intense emotions.” Nini explained. “Sometimes I’d be sad or happy at times, and it helps me when I write down what I feel, so I don’t get overwhelmed.” She paused. That’s how Ricky saw songwriting too. It was like a river flowing through him, freeing him from all the emotion he kept inside. “It also helps to actually play them.” Nini offered, looking at him.

“Okay…” said Ricky, understanding what Nini meant. “It’s not done though… I haven’t even written verses, it’s just the chorus.”

“Anything will do, as long as you let it out.”

Ricky simply nodded at Nini, before resting his hands on the piano keys. He felt comfortable sharing his songs with his friends in the glee club. He wasn’t sure if he was ready to share it to everyone else yet. But his songs have already made it far from just writings on his blue notebook. And that still counts for something.

Ricky began playing the first few chords. It was slow and soft. His voice then accompanied the piano.

♫ I know it's not

Not right now

But I will find a way

For us to be somehow ♫

He felt a familiar sting in his eyes. He was saying goodbye so he can move forward. The glee club needed him to focus. So that’s exactly what he was going to do. He was letting go.

♫ Though it won’t

It won’t be soon

You can bet that

I’m coming back for you ♫

Ricky felt the dam break. His eyes kept flowing, as he played his song. Some of the tears falling on the piano keys. He played with such passion and sang each word full of emotion.

♫ I know it's not

Not right now

But I will find a way

For us to be somehow ♫

Memories flashed before his eyes, of times he spent with EJ. They were supposed to make him smile, but they did the opposite. He missed him so much. EJ made McKinley feel like home. But now Ricky just felt shattered and alone. And feeling as if he had trouble breathing.

♫ Though it won’t

It won’t be soon

You can bet that

I’m coming back for you ♫

He felt himself shake as he played the last few notes.

♫ For you ♫

As song was about to end, Gina stormed off with a dark expression. Nini unable to stop her. Ricky felt drained, as the last few words slipped from his mouth.

♫ For you ♫

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> poor ricky :(  
> also, where is gina storming off too? i wonder :O
> 
> anyways, i do not own the song  
> this is another one of joshua bassett's songs 'Not Right Now' <3
> 
> check it out at his instagram account:  
> https://www.instagram.com/p/B4p9MIIJGMH/
> 
> ill be posting chap 17 this weekend so stay tuned! :3


	17. Regretful Decisions

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chap 17 is here!!!
> 
> this chap sort of covers the whole week of when EJ chose football, so the events will be in chronological order, ending with the friday of that same week.
> 
> anyways, hope you all enjoy this one!

**EJ’s POV**

EJ chose football. He chose it over glee club. They didn’t need him anyways. And EJ didn’t deserve them. He kept telling himself repeatedly over the following days. He felt guilty knowing that the glee club wouldn’t be able to compete if all of them left. Cayden and Riko were torn with the decision as well. He convinced them to go. They were both happier in the glee club than in the football team anyways. EJ needed to stay. He needed to fix what he screwed up.

The team seemed happy enough that he stayed. Which made him question if they even valued their other members. Unfortunately, that didn’t mean they would let EJ off easy though. They actually cornered him after Monday practice.

“So Caswell’s finally got his head in the game for once” said one of his teammates. The others just laughed, while some just kept their eyes on him.

“I’m here because I messed up, and I want to fix it.” EJ said, trying to make eye contact with each.

“Yeah yeah. We know. But we have some conditions.”

“Does coach know about this?” EJ asked.

“He doesn’t. But I’m pretty sure he’d agree with us.” his teammates looked at each other and gave a nod. “First of all, you’re not allowed to hang out with your loser friends anymore. Also, you can’t talk or even wave at any of them, if we see you, you’re out.” EJ had an expression of disgust on his face, and was about to speak, but his teammate cut him off. “That’s not all.” He paused. A slushie cup was passed around. “To prove your commitment to the team. You have to slushie one of the losers tomorrow.”

“What’s that for then?” EJ asked.

“It’s for you.” His teammates said, before he was drenched. “That’s for losing the game for us last week!” They all laughed as they left him alone in the field. EJ felt his eyes sting. Partly caused by the smidge of slushie that got into his eye. But also because he missed his friends. Not to mention he had to slushie one of them tomorrow. He felt like he’s betrayed them enough already.

It wasn’t better when he got home that night. Carlos wouldn’t talk to him and would purposely eat his meals early just so he could go hide in his room. He’d normally drive Carlos to school so he made sure to wake up early the next day. But by the time he was ready to leave, his mom already told him Carlos left. Apparently, he asked Ashlyn to pick him up. He drove to school alone that day, knowing his fate.

And there EJ was. He was being forced to do something he knew he would regret. He was currently standing in front of Nini, with a slushie in his hand. Nini was his best friend, and EJ was hoping that she’d be the one who’d be the most forgiving. His hand shook as his mind knew what he was doing wasn’t him. He looked around to see his teammates getting agitated and giving him the signal to dump it already.

“Just do it Eli.” said Nini, with an understanding smile on her face.

“I don’t want to.” EJ said, with tears threatening to fall from his eyes.

“Don’t worry… I’ll understand…” Nini knew that he was being put up to this. He definitely didn’t deserve her as his best friend. “I’ll clean up fast and won’t even tell anyone.” EJ let the tears fall, as he threw the slushie. Nini closed her eyes and braced for the impact.

  
EJ just stared as the slushie’s contents spilled.

All over the floor.

Nini opened her eyes and stared at EJ with her mouth wide open. That’s when all hell seemed to break loose. EJ’s teammates grabbed him by the collar and dragged him to the locker rooms.

“What the hell Caswell?” one of his teammates said, as they repeatedly shoved him at the lockers. All his teammates suddenly started calling him ‘loser’, ‘useless’, ‘stupid’. He just stood there and took it. The bell suddenly rang and his teammates left one by one muttering insults at him. He felt his knees weaken as his body slid down to the floor. He didn’t know if he could handle this. But he had to.

He can handle this. He was still okay. But he wasn’t prepared for what he saw on Wednesday morning. Which was the thing that hurt him the most.

He saw Ricky walk out from his first period class along with Big Red. Seeing him actually brought a soft smile to EJ’s face. He missed Ricky. But when Ricky turned and looked at his direction, EJ felt like his heart broke into a million pieces. He wasn’t wearing the smile EJ loved seeing. Instead, he seemed depressed as fuck. When Ricky’s eyes met his, he quickly looked away. Was he the reason why Ricky was unhappy? He couldn’t help but think it was his fault, as he slowly walked away.

He spent the whole day trying to forget Ricky’s sad face, but he couldn’t get it out of his head. EJ locked himself in his room that night, refusing to talk to anyone.

EJ sighed as he opened his locker. It was finally Friday. He’s been trying to avoid his friends for the whole week. But every day he’d run into one of them and meet the rest of the day with a mind filled with guilt and regret. He hasn’t seen any of them today, which sort of helped him get through the day.

_Slap_. It echoed throughout the whole locker room. EJ just stared in shock as he held his hand to his face. Gina was there staring at him with wide eyes and her arms crossed.

“What were you **thinking** Caswell?” EJ looked around to see that no one else was in the locker room. Either Gina scared them off or she just caught him at the right time, he will never know. He turned to look at Gina and opened his mouth to answer. “Nope, don’t answer that.” EJ just closed back his mouth and stood there not knowing what to do or say.

“Do you honestly think that choosing football over glee club was going to do you **any** good? I know you’re not some **moron** , you have a **freakin’** 4.3 GPA for **god** knows how. But **really**? Ditching your **badass** friends over these **exhausted** piles of garbage who might as well be the next generation of gigolos or homeless people to roam Lima’s streets. **Really** Caswell?” She had a point. These people were jerks. But he did feel like he had to. After all, he’s the reason they lost their game last Friday.

“Over some game? **Seriously**?” EJ just stared at Gina, surprised at her ability to somehow read his thoughts. “I may have been focused on doing our routines and balancing on the **freakin’** top of the pyramid, but even I could see that these bozos lost the game **on purpose**. They **literally** stopped blocking for you by the second half.” He tried to think back, but Gina still wasn’t finished ranting.

“I have been told by Nini to keep quiet **multiple** times about your whole **crisis** , or whatever this **nonsense** is. But you made Bowen cry, which was **exactly** what I told you **not** to do! I would admit that part of that was me upholding what I owed you, for getting me and Nini together. But **trust** me when I tell you this. You should **never** piss me off. I’m from Lima Heights Adjacent, ya hear? That means you don’t mess with **me** or **any** of my friends.” EJ had to take some time to process everything Gina said, and his mind focused on one detail.

“Wait, Ricky cried?”

“He sure did, while playing a song he wrote for you. So what the hell are you doing Caswell? You get the best group of friends you’re ever gonna get, and even get the cutest boy at school just to let it all go?” EJ opened his mouth to reply, but someone behind them suddenly cleared their throat. The football coach was there, with the whole team behind him.

“What’s going on here?” the football coach said.

“Oh look, it’s Caswell and one of his stupid glee club friends.” said one of EJ’s teammates.

EJ could see Gina attempt to lunge herself at the jock but he was able to restrain her before she did. She started spouting out words in Spanish. EJ couldn’t understand much, but it was probably anything but pleasant. All of his teammates just laughed and made jokes ‘bout how a chick was actually trying to throw a punch.

“What are you doing Caswell? I want to punch that dick’s face” Gina whispered.

“I know you do. But there’s too many of them, and we don’t know what they’ll do. I don’t want you getting yourself suspended either. I’ll try telling coach about the team throwing the game. Maybe he’ll let me off the hook. But you should probably go before some of these jerks get any ideas.” EJ whispered back. Gina grudgingly agreed before nodding and quickly leaving the room.

“Alright! I want no more distractions. Everyone back to the field!” His teammates immediately followed their coach’s orders. EJ was still deep in thought when his coach called his attention. “That includes you Caswell, get in gear!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> fierce and sassy queen Gina here to knock some sense into EJ!!!
> 
> Gina's slap is sort of a throwback to Santana slapping Finn in that one glee episode hehe...
> 
> next chap will be up this wednesday, so stay tuned! :3


	18. True Emotions

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chap 18 is here!!!
> 
> apologies its a bit late, sort of getting caught up with school work and what not :(
> 
> anyways, hope you enjoy! <3

**Ricky’s POV**

Ricky was okay. He got through their rehearsals, all he had to do was erase EJ from his mind. Or at least try to. He put on a mask. Everyone was counting on him, and he can’t let them all down. Sectionals was two days away.

Ms. Jenn told them that they’ll be leaving this Monday after classes. She managed to convince Principal Guiterrez to let them leave a day early. Just so they can practice on the actual stage, and the students can rest well with all the preparations double-checked and ready. Everyone was hyped to say the least.

Ricky was actually able to practice his duet with Nini. They were able to fix the choreography and were all set for the performance. Everyone was happy, including him. But why did he only feel dead inside?

He woke up Monday morning with a headache. _Well, this day’s gonna be shit._ Ricky thought. He took a bath and changed. He noticed his phone ring a few times so he picked it up to check. He had messages from three different people.

Nini: morning! are you awake?

Big Red: dude you up?

Gina: bowen you alive?

Ricky texted them all back saying he was okay. They were the only three who seemed to see through his facade. So they constantly checked on him throughout the weekend. It may seem annoying, but he honestly felt the exact opposite. He was grateful having friends who understood him. He never had friends this close before.

Ricky made sure to put a smile up before he walked downstairs and greeted his father. He couldn’t let his father worry about him. The last thing he needs is to remind his dad of their sad memories about mom leaving. Then they’d have two moping Bowens in the household.

He grabbed a bowl filled it with cereal and milk. He brought it to the table and quietly ate.

“So how’s rehearsals?” his father asked.

“Going great. Sectionals is this Wednesday. We’ll be leaving today after classes, so we have more time for preparation at the actual venue.” His father simply nodded, he already knew because of the consent form he got his father to sign. “Oh, I forgot. Ms. Jenn gave us tickets to give. Um… one each.” Ricky said as he took out his wallet. He stared at the two tickets sitting inside before taking one out to give to his father. He finished his cereal, immediately grabbed his bag and bid his farewell.

“Rick?”

He stopped in his tracks and slowly turned to face his father. He just stared at the floor, trying not to make eye contact. Because he was sure that his dad would figure him out if he did.

“Is everything okay?” his father asked.

“Yeah, totally… why?” said Ricky, while fighting his emotions, trying his hardest to keep them at bay. His father stood from the table and slowly walked towards him.

“Look, I know that you’ve been staying strong. For me. For both of us. But I want you to know that you don’t have to keep doing that.” His dad stopped right in front of him, and looked him in the eye.

“It’s been depressing, ever since your mother left.” Ricky chose to look away, not wanting to dwell on it. “I know.”

“But pretending to be happy, doesn’t solve our problems. The emotions just eat us up inside.” Ricky’s eyes met his father’s, with tears threatening to fall.

“You need to let it all out. Just let it out.” His dad said before wrapping him in a tight embrace.

He let out a breath he didn’t know he was holding and shed a tear. He returned his dad’s warm embrace, while letting his fake smile fade away. His dad didn’t know. _Mom isn’t the only one who left._

“Love ya dad…” said Ricky, after taking a step back.

“Love you too kiddo…” His dad said, as he ruffled Ricky’s hair. Ricky went for one more hug before leaving for school.

He walked to school with his dad’s words in mind. Dad was talking about mom, not EJ. He didn’t know what happened. But it’s alright. Because either way. What his dad had said had gotten through to him.

When he got to school, he barely minded anyone. Big Red asked if he was okay, to which he simply nodded. Big Red just left him alone afterwards, which Ricky was grateful for. All he did for the whole day was write in his little blue notebook.

And that’s why he was there at that moment. At the choir room. Sitting by the piano. He was the only one there, everyone else was still loading their stuff in the van they rented for the trip. He dragged his fingers across the keys. He took out his notebook and set it right in front of him, before opening it to a specific page.

The room was silent, till he played a few notes to start his song. This felt different. He wasn’t letting go anymore. He wasn’t ignoring his emotions, so he could feel strong. He was accepting what he truly felt.

Ricky sang the first words, true to his heart and mind.

♫ Common sense tells me kiss the boy goodbye

Common sense tells me leave it all behind

Common sense says the boy's not worth my time

But common sense ain’t coming when you come to mind ♫

He felt his eyes sting. But these emotions felt stronger. They felt too real. He continued his song, unable to notice there was a person in the room with him.

♫ Common sense told me he was not worthwhile

Common sense said don't go the extra mile

Common sense said go back and reconcile

But common sense forgot about his smile ♫

It felt overwhelming. Ricky felt his whole body shake as the butterflies in his stomach flew wildly.

♫ I think I love you

I want to love you

Please let me love you

I wish to show you how to love ♫

♫ I thought you loved me

I want you to love me

Please baby love me

I wish to show you how to love ♫

Ricky’s fingers stopped moving as he was flooded with emotion. _I can’t do this_.

He ripped off the page he had written the song on and threw it. He stood up planning to leave and head for the doorway, but instead he came face-to-face with Nini.

“Ricky, is everything alright?” Nini asked, with a concerned look.

“It’s just too much Nini. I just tried to let my emotions run free. But it’s too fucking much. It feels like fire. I’m afraid that if it grows too much, I’d get eaten up and drown in flames. I can’t do this. I’m better off forgetting I ever met him.” said Ricky, before wiping his eyes with one hand and trudging away.

Nini was left staring at the direction Ricky left. She picked up the crumpled paper on the ground, not knowing what to do.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 'Common Sense' is honestly the best, but all his songs are great tbh
> 
> check it out at joshua's instagram here:  
> https://www.instagram.com/p/BkvVRj2FHyo/
> 
> hope you all enjoyed this chapter, will post the next this weekend so stay tuned! :3


	19. New Home

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chap 19 is here!!!
> 
> this is a bit longer than most of it, but i hope you all still enjoy it nonetheless!
> 
> love you all! <3

**EJ’s POV**

There was a bright yellow light where EJ was currently staring at. He realized it was surrounded by the color blue, which he soon found out was the sky and dozens of floating white puff, moving across the horizon which he came to discover were actually clouds. He looked around himself and saw that he was standing in a meadow filled with grass and flowers. There was a house behind him, not too far away. He soon came to notice that he was holding something.

EJ found himself looking down at the football he was holding between his small hands. It looked familiar. It was a customized one with the number five etched into it.

“Throw it here kiddo!” a voice said.

Little EJ looked up to see a man with both hands raised above his head. The man was wearing a white t-shirt with long camouflage patterned pants. He had black hair and light green eyes, much like his. It was his father.

EJ looked at the ball one more time before smiling and tossing it toward his father. They continued doing this for what felt like hours, yet little EJ wanted it to last for years. They laughed and played till the sunlight crept behind the trees.

His father threw the ball high toward him. EJ focused his eyes toward it, hoping to catch it. He didn’t realize his father charging towards him with the intention to tackle him. He caught the ball just in time before his father got him. They both landed on the soft ground, cackling, almost out of breath.

They both just laid down there, the only sound existing were their constant effort to regain their breathing. Little EJ sat up and looked at his father.

“What is it kiddo?” his father asked.

“Umm… Well… I was planning to join the mini football league they have at our school.” EJ asked, whilst fidgeting.

“Well, what’s stopping you?” his father asked, sitting up as well to look at him.

“I’m worried that I might not be good enough.” admitted EJ, with small tears forming at the base of his eyes.

“Hey… Hey… Don’t worry…” his dad said, coming close to wrap him in an embrace. EJ simply smiled, he wished he had more moments like this with his dad. “We are Caswells! We never give up!” His dad said throwing both fists up for emphasis. Little EJ just giggled in reply. His dad started tickling him, turning EJ into a fit of laughter. His father suddenly stopped and looked at him with a soft smile. “Besides, even if you don’t. I’m already proud of you.”

His father stood and started patting down his pants, trying to remove the dirt that desperately clung to his clothing. He ruffled little EJ’s hair as he stood up with him. “Anyways… I have to go kiddo.” EJ just held onto his father’s hand as his father started walking away. His hands slowly slipping off his father’s. As his father walks through the metal gates, he turned back to look at EJ one more time, offering him a big smile and one last wave before leaving.

EJ continued playing in the meadow. The sun was nearly gone now. His mother offered him snacks as he went along. He started picking up flowers, trying to collect one of each color. He wanted to give them all to his mom. He looked back at her when he was almost finished. She simply smiled at him, before turning to hear their telephone ringing.

Little EJ continued with his task. When he finally finished he grasped them all with his tiny fist and stood up to give it to his mother. EJ’s body stopped moving as he saw his mother speak to whoever was on the phone. His eyes trailing on the tear that slowly left his mom’s eye.

“NOOOOOOO!”

EJ jolted up from the bed. His breathing heavy, before realizing it was just a dream. He hasn’t had any of those in a long while. He sat up trying to remember the foggy details, when a knock came at his door.

He opened it, and was surprised to see who it was. Well not really that surprised. They both lived under the same roof. But they haven’t talked all week, so EJ thought it was highly unlikely.

“We need to talk.” said Carlos. EJ just nodded in reply. “Look, I know that you have this past with your father and whatnot. I understand what you’re going through, and as your stepbrother, I should have supported your decision, instead of acting like I didn’t know you all of the sudden.”

“Carlos-“

Carlos just held up a finger cutting him off. “It’s just, we’ll be leaving for Sectionals today, and I just didn’t want to leave for the competition without fixing our problem. I don’t want to be constantly thinking about the rift that grew between us while I’m dancing on the stage.”

  
EJ just stood there digesting the information. They were leaving today. Even if he told his coach now, it was too late for him to try to join back. They’ve probably gotten someone else to sing the first song with Ricky. EJ just dropped his head at that thought.

“Look, you really don’t have to apologize, because I sort of messed up as well. I’ve been miserable ever since I left. I miss everyone to be honest. I miss being able to sing at the choir room without caring about the world. I miss playing my guitar to everyone’s sudden song bursts. Hell, I even miss the dancing. But most importantly I miss hanging out with all of you.” EJ said, with a soft smile. “But I guess, I’ll just have to cheer you guys on for the meantime.”

Carlos just hugged him tight. EJ felt like he had retrieved a piece of himself. It felt good, and he wonders why he ever let them all go.

“I missed you too, knucklehead.” They had tears in their eyes. When Carlos pulled away, they both wiped their eyes, before laughing softly. “Now come on, we’ll be late for class. You haven’t even taken a bath yet!” Carlos pinched his nose for emphasis, teasing EJ with a smirk.

EJ just laughed before closing the door and going through his usual morning routine. He walked downstairs grabbed his keys and met Carlos outside, waiting for him. They drove to school blasting music on the speakers. Just like old times. EJ wished it just all went back to how it was before. But he knew that he can fix it. He knew how.

That’s why he spent the whole day staring at time. He barely focused much, because he was excited to finally getting one step closer to his old life.

_Ringgggggggg_. The school bell went, signaling the end of the last period. When it did, he made a beeline straight for the locker room. He finally reached it, only to find that it was empty. He looked around and saw that there were bags already sitting on the benches.

“Caswell! Everyone’s already on the field! Get changed and get out there!” his coach suddenly said, out of nowhere. EJ was about to follow his coach’s orders, before he suddenly stopped and looked at him.

“Coach... Can I talk to you about something?” His coach stared back at him. When his coach didn’t reply, EJ continued to speak. “It’s just that… I’ve heard last game’s loss was a set up. And I just wanted to ask if you knew anything about it?”

“Hmph… What makes you think I would?” muttered his football coach, through gritted teeth. He crossed both hands above his chest. “Besides, you’d think I’d allow any behavior of that sort?”

“Yeah, I didn’t think you would…” EJ said, shaking his head. “It’s still a shame we lost though. The first half was great, but by second half I couldn’t catch a break.”

“Just needs more practice. You need to focus more for the team. Put in the hours.” His coach said patting his shoulder. His coach was about to leave for the field before he said. “’Sides if it was the blocking that fucked things up, I’d have benched those worthless players and gave them a piece of my mind.”

It took a while for EJ to realize it. But that’s when it clicked. EJ never said anything about the blocking causing them the loss, nor did he imply it. He didn’t think his coach would stoop so low just to get him off the glee club. He felt his blood boil. All that self-hatred and doubt he felt throughout that hell week, wasn’t his to feel. All the screaming and shouting they directed at him. All the tears he shed for feeling so useless. It wasn’t supposed to be. He felt his body jolt trying to find anything he could exert force too. He kicked at a football stand not far from him, causing each ball to bounce all over the floor.

“Caswell! What do you think you’re doing?!” His coach shouted at him.

“It was you! You set up that game so I would lose! So you could force me to quit glee! So I would spend all these days feeling miserable and despicable!”

“What I did made you stronger! Made you a man! You shouldn’t waste your time singing lame songs and spinning around on stage! Is that what you think your father would have wanted?”

He looks back to all those moments he laughed and smiled while he was in glee club. Playing his guitar and singing his favorite songs. Laughing when he tripped while struggling with their dance routines.

He looked back to all the new friends he made. Gina, Big Red, Natalie, Kourtney, Riko, Cayden. They were all great people, and always had his back whenever he needed help. They’d help him with his dancing and with his harmonizing. He honestly can’t imagine how it was like for three years, without hanging out with all of them, along with Nini, Carlos and Ashlyn. That’s how much memories he’s made.

His mind raced to find the person he missed the most. Ricky. Those hazel brown eyes, long curls, and the dimples that come out when he smiled. _When he used to smile._ EJ thought sadly. The soft kisses he’d leave on EJ’s cheek, and the warm hugs he’d always give. The times they’d jam out to tunes they’ve discovered from one another. And the times he’d just sit contently while EJ wrapped his arms around him.

He missed it all.

His mind brought him to that day, when he finally chose to join glee club. His mother’s words echoed in his mind. He pictured her soft smile as she held him close.

_I know that I always tell you how proud I am that you’re following your father’s footsteps, but following him doesn’t necessarily mean that you give up on your own dreams. It’s about being the same kind of person that he was. He was a person that always did what was right and chased for his life’s desires._

_Always remember I will always be proud of you no matter what, and I’m sure that your father would say the same._

He thought he was doing right by his father, by still staying in the team while he joined glee.

He thought he was doing right by himself, when he quit to redeem himself.

But that wasn’t him. EJ suddenly felt like a stranger standing there in the locker room. A lost soul trying to find his way home. He knew where home was. It wasn’t here.

EJ took out his jersey from his locker, and stared at the big five that was printed behind it. He was happy the day he got it. He immediately drove to the cemetery to visit his father’s gravestone. A soft breeze hit his shoulder as he stood in front of it. He always felt as if it was his father’s hand, congratulating him and saying that he was proud.

“No.” EJ said suddenly as he pulled the fabric between his hands. “This is what he would have wanted.” He tore the jersey in half and threw it to the ground. His coach just stared at him furiously as EJ grabbed his things, shoved it in his bag and bolted towards the exit door.

"Caswell! You walk out that door, I'm kicking you off the team!"

  
EJ stopped at his tracks. Before muttering his reply.

"You're not kicking me off… I quit!" said EJ, without turning his face.

EJ ran through the hallways and made it out of McKinley’s doors. He breathed in the fresh air.

He felt free.

He dropped his bag on the pavement as he brushed his fingers through his hair.

“Elijah James Caswell.” a female voice spoke. EJ turned to see who it was. It was Nini. She was smiling at him. He rushed towards her and wrapped her in a big hug.

“You have no idea how much I’ve missed you!” EJ exclaimed.

“I missed you too Eli.” Nini said returning the hug. When she pulled apart she just stared at EJ’s wide grin. “So how you’ve been?”

“Well… I finally quit football.” Nini gave him a shocked expression, before offering him a soft smile.

“Well, looks like I **finally** got my bestfriend back” She said laughing. EJ replied with a mock hurt face, which made Nini laugh harder. “Kidding. You always were.” They both giggled and kept joking with each other, till EJ noticed a white van nearby.

His eyes caught sight of the boy he loved, sitting at the very back. A frown occupying the said boy’s face. Nini caught where his eyes were focused on and started explaining to him what happened. She told him that Ricky was trying to fight away his feelings. Because he couldn’t focus at their rehearsals enough to carry through a number. EJ just stared at the ground, feeling his heart clench.

“You think he’ll ever forgive me? Or anyone at glee club, for that matter?”

“I’m sure they all would... Ricky too… But it will take some time.” said Nini, with a sympathetic look.

Nini opens her bag to pull something out. EJ was too busy thinking of how to apologize to everyone, when Nini held something up to him. It was a crumpled paper. EJ was confused, but took it nonetheless.

"You’ll figure out what to do" Nini said, smiling. She gave him another hug before running towards the van, leaving EJ with a puzzled look. EJ looked at the paper in his hand, before unwrinkling it. He stared at its contents. He looked up to see the van leaving. He held his gaze on Ricky, until he eventually lost sight of them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> well that was a lot to take in.  
> what do you guys think the paper was, that nini gave him? :O
> 
> anyways, ill be working on chap 20 this whole week probably,  
> ill post it next weekend, since it would definitely be longer than my normal chapter
> 
> so until then, hope you all stay tuned! <3


	20. Do It All Again

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chap 20!!!! this is the longest out of all the chapters ive written :3
> 
> gosh this has truly been an experience for me. although i may admit that ive dropped important things that i had to do so i could complete this fic.  
> it may have been hectic but i finally got here.
> 
> so i would like to thank all off those who take time to actually read my fic. i appreciate all your kind words and criticisms.  
> they actually motivate me to finish it. so yeah... thanks a lot to everyone.
> 
> disclaimer: i dont use any of the songs used in this chapter  
> i also added lyrics to joshua's songs but this does not grant me ownership of the songs themselves
> 
> without further ado, heres the finale! hope you enjoy!

**Ricky’s POV**

It was Sectionals Day, and everyone was excited. They all did their morning routines and gathered in the hallway. Carlos came a few minutes later and called them to Ms. Jenn’s room. Apparently, Ms. Jenn woke up with a fever. She had to stay and rest, meaning they had to go to the competition without her. They all frowned, yet Ms. Jenn told them to not worry. She was confident enough that they were going to win. She said she could feel it in her gut.

“Today’s the day we’ve all been waiting for * **cough* *cough*** ” said Ms. Jenn. She told everyone to hold hands with whoever was close to them. They were standing in a circle around the bed.

“I realized, you all walked into this glee club as * **cough*** strangers” she said. There were whispers of ‘we already knew each other’ between some of the members, until she hushed them.

“But ever since * **cough*** , we’ve all become family.” They all just smiled at one another, knowing that Ms. Jenn was right. They all have grown closer and they would most certainly do anything for each other. Ricky smiled at every single one, remembering the time he first interacted with each. He had no regrets.

“Feel each other’s * **cough*** energy. Let the silence speak volumes. Erase all your fears and hesitations, because in a world full of * **cough*** no, this is a space full of yes.”

“Nice! Did you just come up with that?” Carlos whispered, with closed eyes.

“Yes… * **cough*** * **cough*** ” said Ms. Jenn, she all smiled at all of them. Ricky practically thought of her as his mother, which was sort of comforting, considering he didn’t have one. They all bid their ‘goodbyes’ and ‘get well soons’ before they rushed down the stairway and boarded the bus.

They soon arrived at the venue where Sectionals was being held. Some of the member’s parents were waiting for them at the entrance. Hugs were given around. Ricky noticed his father wasn’t there, but he soon received a text, that his dad will be running late. He let out a sigh of relief as they all entered the auditorium. They went to sit at the assigned seats for the participating schools. All ten members took their seats as the crowd kept murmuring until the competition started. They were fifth to perform that day, out of five schools. The slots were already set since the beginning of the year, but since their glee club was reinstated just recently, they were given the last slot.

Ricky kept his silence ever since they left the motel. He felt like there was something missing. It wasn’t his father, since he knew that his father would be coming soon. All his friends were there, so why did he feel bothered. He soon came to one conclusion, but tried to shake it away. He knew who his mind was thinking about. He returned his focus on the stage. He just can’t let the glee club down. They were like his second family.

The lights soon dimmed as the host introduced himself.

“ **Welcome to the 2020 Western Ohio Show Choir Sectionals!** ” The audience went wild. The host then introduced each judge and briefly discussed the rules and scoring mechanics. He explained that there will be an intermission in between each performance to allow each competitor to prepare.

**“And without further ado, we have our first contester. Give a round of applause for the Dalton Academy Warblers!”** The curtains pulled apart revealing the ‘Warblers’, which seemed to be an all-male group. They began singing in acapella, which shocked them. The spotlight turned to focus on one member. A blonde boy with a smirk on his lip. He started singing the words to ‘Teenage Dream’ by Katy Perry. He had a great voice, not to mention how the arrangement of beatbox and hums from his fellow teammates complimented his performance.

The boy suddenly started staring at their direction, smiling as he seemed to make eye contact with someone from the group. Everyone turned to look at Carlos who was in pure awe and had the widest smile on his face. Natalie started teasing Carlos about gazing back into the blonde’s eyes. Carlos just tried to hide in embarrassment, as his cheeks started to redden. Ricky couldn’t help but smile for both of them.

When the Warblers all lined up in formation and sang the last word together with harmony, the crowd started cheering. Carlos stood up giving them a standing ovation, and the whole group just laughed at him because of how smitten he was for the blonde boy after only one performance.

There was a short intermission after the Warblers left the stage. They all just waited and wondered how the other competitors would fare. So far it seemed like they weren’t winning without a fight. The first group had put up a great performance, so it was most likely the other groups would perform at the same level.

The host introduced the next group which received its own round of applause from the audience. The lights dimmed as two spotlights were aimed at the edges of the stage. Ricky somehow had a bad feeling in his gut and he didn’t know why. Music started playing and they all stared at each other, as a boy entered the stage singing the first words of ‘Breaking Free’. He was later followed by a girl who sang the next verse.

Gina started scrambling through her bag, looking for something. He noticed Gina take out her phone and go wild on her keypad. Ricky was too focused on what was happening in front of them. He didn’t bother asking what she was doing. He instead looked at Nini who was right beside him and she was covering her eyes as if she was pretending the duo was performing anything else. Anything else besides the duet they were supposed to sing as their own opening number.

The crowd was in tears at their performance. The song, most probably bringing back memories of the famous movie trilogy. When they finished, everyone in the crowd clapped except them. Ricky felt like he wanted to shrink and disappear from view. The group on stage switched to an upbeat performance which made everyone feel better. _Maybe it was just a coincidence._ Ricky thought, as he sat back properly on his seat. As the performance finished, they all clapped softly, still bothered by the fact that one of their songs were already used.

An intermission came after the second choir left the stage. Ricky looked around at everyone, suddenly avoiding conversation. The moment the host introduced the next school, and the curtains opened. The moment they all sang the first words in unison. Carlos immediately stood up, and called everyone to the waiting room. The third group was singing ‘Anyway You Want It’ which was supposed to be their upbeat song right after ‘Breaking Free’. They all stood up and silently walked towards the back.

_Who could have done this?_ Ricky thought.

They all piled up in the waiting room, taking seats on the couches and chairs that were spread across the room. Everyone was avoiding eye contact with one another.

“This is a disaster. What are we going to do?” Natalie spoke up. They all kept their mouths shut, not really knowing what to say.

“Look, we’re all back here ‘cause our set list was obviously leaked. Someone should say something.” said Ashlyn.

“Are you saying that you think one of us did it?” Riko asked, with a look of disgust.

“No! No! That’s not what I meant!” said Ashlyn, waving both her hands.

“I mean you guys did come from the moronic football team, they bully us every single day and try to make our lives a living hell, so who’s to say it wasn’t them.” Kourtney said, pointing at Cayden and Riko.

Everyone started taking sides. The others mentioning the time when Cayden himself, slushied Ashyln last year. Natalie went up to defend him, saying that he’s changed since then, but they all seemed to try and find someone to blame for what was happening. Everyone coming up with bizarre theories of each one’s possible motives. Ricky just sat still, trying to ignore the shouting. He hugged a pillow close to his chest.

“And what are you doing Gina hmm? Updating the football team?” someone called Gina out, amidst all the arguing. She was texting the whole time, ever since the second performance.

“Screw you! This is important.” Ricky heard Gina reply, before she walked out of the room. The shouting continued. It got to the point where Ricky had to let go of the pillow to cover both his ears. All of it was reminding him of the times his father and mother argued before they separated.

The shouting droned on and on. It seemed to get louder and louder. It was as if the hands that were covering his ears weren't even there. _Just make it stop._ His eye's met Nini's, and she immediately stood up from her spot.

“Stop it! All of you!” shouted Nini. Everyone stopped and turned their attention to her. “What happened to us? Have you all forgotten about all those times that we’ve spent together, in and outside of the choir room? All those memories we made? Are you all seriously throwing that away? Do you any of you guys honestly think that one of us did this?” Nini’s voice cracked as she held back tears. “This is supposed to be a family.”

  
Everyone stopped to look at one another, then stooped their heads at the ground. There was a long awkward silence, until a shadow crept through the doorway.

“She’s right… This is a family.” said a voice. Gina had entered the room along with a familiar face. There were faces of shock as they all stared at the person who stood before them, who wore a red and white letterman jacket.

There he stood. The boy that Ricky has been trying to erase from his mind. The boy that he’s been crying about ever since he left. The boy that he missed no matter how hard he denied it.

“I’m probably the last person you guys want to see. And I know that some of you may still be disappointed or angry about what I did.” EJ said, dropping his bag to the ground. He had a guitar with him. Ricky tried to hide EJ from his view, he tried to look anywhere else. “But I’m here to apologize… in the way that I love, in a way that I’ve missed doing, with all of you.”

EJ started strumming a few chords, which surprised Ricky a little. They were familiar. EJ started singing the first verse, and Ricky realized why.

♫ Common sense tells me kiss the boy goodbye

Common sense tells me leave it all behind

Common sense says the boy's not worth my time

But common sense ain’t coming when you come to mind ♫

Ricky didn’t know what to feel. Was EJ really using **his** song to apologize? He doesn’t understand what the point of it was.

♫ Common sense told me he was not worthwhile

Common sense said don't go the extra mile

Common sense said go back and reconcile

But common sense forgot about his smile ♫

EJ continued singing with his low, soothing voice. Ricky missed him.

♫ I think I love you

I want to love you

Please let me love you

I wish to show you how to love ♫

Ricky felt himself smile, but he quickly dismissed it. If this was how EJ was going to apologize to him; to everyone, then he wasn’t going to accept it. He stood up and headed for the doorway, trying to hide his face from everyone. He assumed the song was finished, since that was how far he wrote. But EJ started singing another verse, which stopped Ricky in his tracks.

♫ Second chances are thought of the be weak

Second chance is in volumes do they speak

Second chances aren't given usually

But second chance is all I really need ♫

Ricky had his back turned, but he knew that EJ was looking directly at him. The voice was slowly getting louder, as EJ walked closer toward him.

♫ Second chance to mend what I have scarred

Second chance to build what fell apart

Second chance to go right back to the start

A second chance to fix a broken heart ♫

Ricky turned around to see EJ right there behind him. Ricky let his tears fall, but it was different. He wasn’t sad at all, he was actually happy. EJ wrote something for him. He stared into EJ’s eyes as the boy went back to the chorus.

♫ I think I love you

I want to love you

Please let me love you

I wish to show you how to love

I thought you loved me

I want you to love me

Please baby forgive me

I wish to show you how to love ♫

Ricky felt himself nodding, as if to answer EJ’s song. EJ reached for his face, to wipe the tear that strayed from Ricky’s eye. Ricky smiled as he looked into the boy’s green eyes. EJ grinned back and turned to face everyone else in the room, as he continued singing another verse.

♫ Second chance, I’m sorry truthfully

Second chance, it’s not what its s'pposed to be

Second chance, I’ll be all yours faithfully

'Cause all of you mean so much more

To me-e-e-e-e ♫

Ricky looked to all his friends, to see them all smiling at EJ. 

♫ All of you mean so much more ♫

EJ’s strumming slowed down as he said the last few words.

♫ To me ♫

They all smiled glancing between each other, until someone yelled ‘Group hug!’ and everyone stood up to gather in one big embrace. They all laughed and apologized. Each one taking time to talk to one another, for the harsh words that slipped their lips.

“So what now?” Natalie asked, as everyone settled down.

“We need a new set list, and we only have an hour left.” said Carlos, looking at his wristwatch.

“Then there’s no time to lose” said EJ, he pause to think. He turned around to look at Gina before speaking again. “Gina you think you could come up with a dance routine with Red? It will help lessen the choreography we’ll need if we focus on two.”

“We may have something up our sleeves.” said Big Red, excitedly grabbing his bag. He zipped it open to bring out a pair of tap shoes. “I always bring them around with me. They’re sort of my comfort blanket.”

“Good to have you back Caswell.” remarked Gina, before walking off with Big Red. Nini volunteered to help out, so she rushed along with them.

The group just laughed at Big Red’s silliness, they all turned back at EJ. Waiting for him to speak again. Ricky just admired how he took charge. It was one of the many qualities of EJ that he adored.

“Carlos, Riko, Cayden.” EJ called out. The people in question nodded to acknowledge him. He brought out his phone to search for a song. He gave it to Carlos, who simply smiled at his song choice. “We’ll need choreography for the group number. Think you could figure something out?”

“It’s gonna be choppy” Cayden said, with a worried expression.

“Good. We’re best when we’re loose” said EJ. Cayden nodded and smiled before, they all went to the table that was set at the edge of the room, immediately starting to work on the dance routine. Natalie and Ashlyn went along with them, trying their best to help.

“We still need an opening number.” Kourtney spoke up. “Something fresh and new.” The remaining people pausing to think. EJ turned to look at Ricky who was silent the whole time. Ricky looked up into EJ’s eyes, and somehow read what he was thinking.

“No… I’m not ready for that.” Ricky said, shaking his head. EJ wanted him to sing one of his own songs.

“You think you aren’t, but you are.” said EJ, taking a hold of one of Ricky’s hands. “You’re amazing okay? All you have to do is believe in yourself.”

“What if they don’t like it?” Ricky asked, staring down at the floor.

“I know that they’ll **love** it!” EJ replied. “These songs you’ve been writing, they’re a part of who you are.“ Ricky kept his gaze down, but listened to everything EJ said. “You’re the sweetest, kindest and most caring person I know. You always care about other people’s problems, before worrying about your own. You always try to be strong for everyone. And you **are** strong. You’re strong enough to fight your own emotions, just so you could be here for everyone. That’s easier said than done.” EJ paused for a moment. He looked into his eyes before he continued.

“The audience will love you Ricky… Just as I do too.” Ricky looked up into EJ’s eyes as he said those words. It must have been the first time either of them has said it. It may not have been direct, but the meaning was there. There was a long pause, while EJ waited for him to reply.

“I’ll try.” said Ricky giving a short nod, while smiling softly. EJ grinned at him and went ahead to check everyone’s progress. They had less than an hour till performance, so they quickly tried to put everything together. Cayden, Riko and Carlos finished the choreography for the background of their dance song, as well as their group number and taught it to everyone else. They tried to keep it simple, so everyone could keep up.

Moments later, the lights flickered in their room, signaling that they were next to perform. Carlos called Ms. Jenn for her to give a few words. She was still in bed, but seemed better than she was this morning. They told her everything that happened, and she was relieved that they had made back-up plan. She saw EJ through the video call, and immediately voiced out how much she had missed him, and how happy she was that he was back. Ms. Jenn started giving them words of encouragement as they all huddled in a circle. Ricky hoped that the audience would like their performance, even though it was put up only an hour ago. They left the waiting room one by one and proceeded backstage.

It was time.

The intermission on stage was all cleared up, and the crowd went silent.

Ricky felt his heart beat wildly in his chest, as the host stepped on stage and introduced their group. He felt his breathing hasten as he heard the crowd cheer and saw the curtains open. He felt his body shake as he stood there, center stage. The spotlight hitting him straight on.

The speakers rang with guitar strings, as the song started playing. Ricky looked to his side, to see EJ playing the guitar in front of a mic stand, hidden from the audience’s view.

Ricky felt his lips quiver, as he started singing along with the guitar. He started imagining that he was standing in the choir room. Singing his song to all of his friends.

♫ Excuse the mess I made

When you were mine

I’m still learning how to love ♫

He grew confident as he imagined their faces smiling back at him as they all listened contently to his song.

♫ This is quite new to me

It’s all bizarre

I don’t feel like I belong ♫

Someone from the crowd suddenly cheered, which distracted Ricky, making him lose track of the words. He was thrust back into reality, the crowd waiting on the next words of the song. A voice suddenly filled the silence, drawing Ricky’s attention to the side of the stage.

♫ I know you're nervous

But I won’t let you fall

And we weren’t perfect

You were worth it all ♫

EJ sang the next part of the song, as he entered the stage. The audience cheering softly as EJ came along. He looked at Ricky and whispered. “Just look at me Ricky. Look at me.”

♫ If it were my call ♫

Ricky stared up into EJ’s eyes and he found the courage that always came along with him. Ricky smiled softly as he felt his trembling body relax. His voice melding with EJ’s as they both sang.

♫ I’d do it all againnnnnnnn ♫

The crowd started waving their hands in unison as they both sang. They both spun on stage simply dancing with one another, as if they were alone in the massive room.

♫ I’d do it all againnnnnnnn ♫

Their friends entered the stage and took their places behind them, the crowd cheering as they did. Everyone was there except Cayden who continued playing the guitar at the side of the stage. Ricky looked at all his friends as he sang the next verse.

♫ This place will always

Remain in my heart

I’ve made friends I can depend on ♫

EJ took a turn singing as they made their way around everyone, smiling toward each other from time to time.

♫ I’ve made more memories

Than I can count

There’s nothing I regret ♫

They both made it back to the front of the stage to sing the chorus. A lot of the audience, had brought out their cellphones, turned on their flashlights and waved them in the air along with the song’s melody.

♫ I know you're nervous

But I won’t let you fall

And no one’s perfect

You’re all worth it all ♫

Ricky and EJ’s voices harmonized as they went around the stage waving at the audience. Memories flashing in Ricky’s mind as he sang.

♫ If it were my call ♫

Big Red helping him out when he got slushied on the first day. He was the very first friend Ricky ever made. Then he introduced him to Gina that same day. He didn’t feel so alone anymore.

♫ I’d do it all againnnnnnnn ♫

Auditioning for glee club, singing one of his songs. He nervously laughed as he finished, but the people that auditioned with him were cheering and clapping from their seats.

♫ I’d do it all againnnnnnnn ♫

Stumbling over the choreography when they had that booty camp rehearsal for their dancing. His friends would joke about his dancing, but they’d cheer him on and try to teach him the best they can.

♫ I’d do it all againnnnnnnn ♫

Playing piano, for everyone’s impromptu song bursts. He’d jump the first chance he gets if there’s one in the room while someone was singing. He loved playing for his friends.

♫ I’d do it all againnnnnnnn ♫

Bumping into the very first person he met at McKinley. Who so happens to be the person he’s singing with at the moment. He can’t imagine how different it would have all been if he hadn’t met EJ that day.

He’d happily go through all of those memories again, if ever he got the chance.

They both ran toward center stage to sing the last words.

♫ I’d do it all… ♫

Ricky felt his heartbeat pounding in his chest as they both finished the song.

♫ Again ♫

Ricky and EJ smiled at each other, as the crowd cheered for their performance. Ricky ducked his head, as he took in the applause. _They liked my song._ Ricky thought, his smile growing larger. EJ took a step back and clapped for Ricky, each and every one of their friends following in suit. Ricky held both his hands to his chest as he took a short bow.

EJ took hold of his hand as they both ran to their positions for the next song.

Everyone was facing the audience except Nini, who was between Gina and Big Red. Gina attached a ribbon to Nini’s hair, as the music started playing. Nini moved her hips to the beat and took hold of her microphone.

♫ Well sometimes I go out by myself

And I look across the water ♫

Nini walked down the steps as she started singing. Everyone accompanying her voice with ‘ohs’ and ‘ahs’. They all followed Cayden, Riko and Carlos as they danced behind Nini.

♫ And I think of all the things, what you're doing

And in my head I paint a picture ♫

Nini walked towards Gina as she sang the next verse. Gina twirled around her, before she did a flip into a split to land her fall. The crowd went wild for Gina’s prowess, as Nini walked over to the other side of the stage.

♫ 'Cause since I've come on home, well my body's been a mess

And I've missed your ginger hair and the way you like to dress ♫

Big Red danced around Nini before doing a quick tap dance routine, which received an applause from the crowd as he tapped along with the beat. The black tap dance shoes he wore, shining in the spotlight as they hit the stage.

♫ Won't you come on over, stop making a fool out of me ♫

Nini shook her body as she went center stage before continuing the chorus to the song.

♫ Why won't you come on over Valerie ♫

Gina and Big Red ran towards where Nini stood, and started dancing together. They started doing crazy flips and spins, earning another loud cheer from the audience.

♫ Valerie, Valerie

Why won't don’t come on over ♫

Everyone else backed up to Nini’s vocals as they danced behind the three who practically owned the performance.

♫ Valerie, Valerie

Why won't don’t come on over ♫

Nini came up to the mic stand that was standing at the side, as all the girls flocked towards her, and the boys strut towards the opposite side.

♫ Well sometimes I go out by myself and

I look across the water ♫

She waved her hand along with everyone, as she sang the song with the mic in her other hand. The boys doing their own choreography at the other end.

♫ And I think of all the things, what you're doing

And in my head I paint a picture ♫

She blew a kiss at Gina, who mockingly caught it before running back towards Big Red to continue with their mind-blowing dance routine.

♫ 'Cause since I've come on home, well my body's been a mess

And I've missed your curly hair and the way you like to dress ♫

Nini clapped her hands in time with the beat, while she sang. The audience simply at awe at all the motion and flexibility Big Red and Gina exhibited.

♫ Won't you come on over, stop making a fool out of me ♫

She glanced towards Gina as she flipped in the air, and twirled for the crowd. She beamed proudly at her, as she walked towards everyone else at the back.

♫ Why don't you come on over Valerie ♫

She pumped her fist as she sang. The ribbon bouncing atop her hair as she did so.

♫ Valerie ♫

The audience began clapping along as they all danced around the stage.

♫ Valerie

Valerie, Valerie

Valerie ♫

Nini swayed side to side as she watched Gina and Big Red jump into the air at the same time, tilting their bodies forward.

♫ Why don't you come on over Valerie? ♫

Both Big Red and Gina’s feet landed on the ground as they managed to perform a flip at the same time. Nini rushed to Gina’s side to give her a warm embrace. The crowd stood up clapping for their performance. But they still had one song left.

The backtrack to their song already playing in the background, as each of them started humming and singing ‘ahs’ along to it.

Ricky stepped out from the group, a spotlight immediately pointing at him as he sang.

♫ Just a small town girl

Livin' in a lonely world

She took the midnight train goin' anywhere ♫

EJ took his turn with his deep and mellow voice, as another spotlight shone on him.

♫ Just a city boy

Born and raised in South Detroit

He took the midnight train goin' anywhere ♫

A guitar riff came and went, as the beat progressed. They all raised their hands up in the air and kept at it with their acapella, which worked amazingly with the song.

Gina was hand and hand with Nini as they walked towards center stage. She brought her mic towards her lips as she sang the next verse.

♫ A singer in a smokey room

The smell of wine and cheap perfume ♫

Nini smiled at her as she took her own mic and continued singing the song. Both of them spun around each other as Nini sang.

♫ For a smile they can share the night

It goes on and on and on and on ♫

They all shook their shoulders back and forth as they sang the chorus.

♫ Strangers waiting

Up and down the boulevard

Their shadows searchin' in the night ♫

The crowd already standing, were bopping their heads and dancing along with the music.

♫ Streetlight, people

Livin' just to find emotion

Hidin' somewhere in the night ♫

They danced as they sang, back and forth across the stage. Big Red stepped forward and sang next verse as he walked from one side of the stage to another.

♫ Workin' hard to get my fill

Everybody wants a thrill ♫

He met up with Ashlyn, who continued singing after him. Both smiling at each other as they sang.

♫ Payin' anythin' to roll the dice

Just one more time ♫

Natalie and Cayden sang together, their voices fitting perfectly as everyone danced around them.

♫ Some will win, some will lose

Some are born to sing the blues ♫

Carlos stepped out of the circle into the spotlight and sang his part, scanning the crowd. He was looking for a certain blonde boy in a black blazer. Once he spotted him, he smiled and waved as he hit the high note before the chorus. They could see the boy wave back as Carlos moved into a line with everyone else.

♫ Oh the movie never ends

It goes on and on and on and on ♫

Riko did a triple flip across the stage, as Gina twirled at the very center. They sang with all their heart. They all loved what they were doing. Everything leading up to that point, was worth it. Maybe even the slushies, because they somehow made them grow closer and stronger.

♫ Strangers waiting

Up and down the boulevard

Their shadows searchin' in the night

Streetlight, people

Livin' just to find emotion

Hidin' somewhere in the night ♫

Kourtney sang the highest note in the song, which made the crowd go wild. She held it for an insane amount of time before she headed back to the group.

♫ Don't stooooooop! ♫

She started doing insane riffs and adlibs as they sang together. The audience clapping and cheering for her massive vocal range.

♫ Don't stop believin'

Hold on to that feelin'

Streetlight, people, oh oh oh ♫

They lined up and walked towards the front of the stage singing the chorus one more time.

♫ Don't stop believin'

Hold on to that feelin'

Streetlight, people ♫

They turned back from the audience before singing the last words in unison.

♫ Don't stop! ♫

They all threw their fists in the air as the song ended. The audience shouting and cheering their loudest as they smiled and laughed with one another. The spotlights were dimmed as they all took their bows at the same time.

The curtains closed, as the backstage crew told them to rest in the waiting room. They happily complied. They laughed and talked about their favorite moments from their performance. Ricky himself couldn’t really believe that they pulled it off.

Once they were back, they all began exchanging hugs with everyone. Ricky himself literally just throwing his arms around everyone he could, still high from all the adrenaline that shot through him during the performance. He was so distracted, that he didn’t notice who he eventually wrapped his arms around.

“Hello.” That someone was EJ, and although he did apologize and help them through their crisis. He didn’t quite know where he stood with the other boy. Were they back to dating? He didn’t really know. He let go of his arms and hid them behind his back.

“Oh sorry, I got distracted” Ricky said, ruffling his own hair. He looked away, not really knowing what to do. EJ just stared at him before he chuckled and spoke.

“That the second time today?” said EJ, while smirking. Ricky paused for a moment. That was familiar. He mentally face palmed himself when he realized why that was the case.

“Did I even make a good first impression?” asked Ricky.

“Nah… Anyone would give it a five out of ten.” EJ teased. “But for me. It was an eleven.” Ricky felt those butterflies once again claim their territory, as they flew about wildly.

  
The air around them felt familiar. Ricky would be lying to himself if he said he didn’t miss these kinds of conversations with the boy. He smiled as he looked into his green eyes. The very first thing he noticed when he bumped into EJ.

Ricky noticed those two orbs of sparkling emerald grow closer, and that was because the person who owned them was slowly inching towards his face.

He could literally feel the warm breath as it grazed against his skin.

Ricky felt his eyes flutter shut as he just let it happen.

But of course it didn’t.

Someone had cleared their throat to call their attention.

“Sorry to interrupt EJ, but can I talk to my son?” Mr. Bowen said, obviously proud and excited to chat all about the performance.

“Sure thing, Mr. Bowen.” said EJ, rubbing the back of his neck.

“I told you, it’s Mike.” said Ricky’s father, laughing as he pat EJ’s back. EJ nodded, smiling softly at Ricky before walking away. His dad obviously didn’t know what had happened between them. But since everything was cleared up and fixed, he really didn’t feel the need to tell his dad about it.

Ricky stared after EJ as his dad rambled on about how amazing everyone was. By the time his dad had started to talk about his song, EJ was already out from his view.

“That song was beautiful kiddo. I’m way beyond happy, that you’re finally letting them out of that little blue notebook you always carry around.” his father said, smiling at him.

“Yeah, I couldn’t have done it by myself though.” said Ricky as he looked back at the doorway EJ had gone through.

Just then, someone from the backstage crew came in and called all of their attention. The awarding ceremony was going to begin in ten minutes and they needed all the schools to be behind the curtains in five. They did as they were told. Ricky making sure to wrap his dad in a tight embrace, before the parents headed back to their seats.

“Thanks dad.” said Ricky.

“For what?” his dad asked, but accepted Ricky’s hug nonetheless.

“For everything. I wouldn’t have been able to meet everyone and have this opportunity, if we never moved in here. And I would have been stuck in turmoil, if you hadn’t talked to me about my emotions.”

“Kiddo, it’s my job to help you through your problems. Also, if you really want to. We can stay here.” His dad pat him in the back, before Ricky pulled away with a look of shock on his face.

“We can?” He stared at his father, thinking he must have been joking.

“Why not? All this moving is getting old, and tiresome at this point.” His father smiled at him, as Ricky’s shocked expression slowly turned into a smile of his own. Ricky hugged him again and kept shouting ‘Thank yous’ over and over again. “Plus, I met a pretty blondie at the bowling alley last weekend, and she actually seems interested in me.” His dad whispered.

“Okay, too much detail dad.” Ricky said, closing his eyes and waving his hands rapidly in front of him. His dad laughed, before he headed back into the auditorium. Ricky found his way towards to the door to the backstage area, everyone was already there.

The curtains opened a few moments later, and the crowd cheered loudly for all the participating groups. The host went back on stage and had in his hand a white envelope, which was most probably the results from the judges.

Ricky didn’t have to own a stethoscope, to know that everyone’s hearts were beating wildly in their chests, as the host opened the envelope to see what was within. His heart was practically trying to jump out at that point.

“ **Now remember, from these five groups, only three will be receiving trophies today. And from those three, only one will be proceeding to Regionals next month.** ” The host explained, which did nothing to calm their nerves.

“ **And now, without further ado. Drumroll please!** ” The host requested. He waited for the crew to play the track before continuing. “ **Ladies and Gentlemen! In third place…** ”

The drumroll track had played again, a bit longer this time. “ **From North Central High School, The Hoosierdaddies!** ” The group mentioned excitedly stepped up and claimed their trophy from one of the judges that stood on stage. People from the crowd cheered for their accomplishment. “ **Congratulations Hoosierdaddies!** ”

“ **Now… In second place… drumroll again please.** ” The host continued when the cheering had died down.

“ **All the way from the Dalton Academy, The Dalton Academy Warblers!** ” The Warblers jumped out of excitement. They encouraged the blonde boy to take the trophy from the judge. He blushed and scoot his way to take it. The audience cheering as he took it in his hands. He returned to his teammates, and they all congratulated him.

Ricky turned his attention toward the host, as he stared at the card he was holding.

This was it.

Ricky hated all this tension. All these unnecessary pauses, which delayed their impending fate.

The drumroll wasn’t a big help either.

The fact that there were two other groups that weren’t placed yet along with them, made it worse.

He felt a hand graze his, and he instinctively took it. The feeling was familiar enough that Ricky already knew who it was without looking. He smiled softly as it helped him calm down a bit.

EJ just held his hand as they waited for the host to speak again.

“ **And the moment you’ve all been waiting for!** ” The crowd cheered as he spoke. **“The winner, of the 2020 Western Ohio Show Choir Sectionals, who will be receiving their trophy, and moving on to Regionals is…** ” The drumroll played, but Ricky felt his heart beat even faster.

Time seemed to slow down, as Ricky was both excited and scared to hear the words from the host’s mouth.

Ricky looked around at all his friends who were all in the same state as he was.

He spotted his dad sitting near the back row, who was already smiling.

He turned to his side, at the boy who held his hand. He saw EJ turn to glance at him, with a soft smile.

No matter if they lost, Ricky still felt like he won at something. Something better than some trophy they’ll be displaying in the choir room.

He felt like he won in life.

He had the most supportive friends. He had a devoted and caring father.

And he had the boy he loved right beside him, holding his hand.

He felt EJ squeeze his hand softly, Ricky returning the gesture as the host’s voice echoed throughout the room.

“ **From William McKinley High School, The New Directions!** ” They all burst with happiness. Some bursting with tears. They were all too busy celebrating, as it seemed. Because the host eagerly took the trophy from one of the judges and handed it off to them. “Congratulations!” he said to all of them before facing the crowd. Everyone kept jumping up and down, giddy and lightheaded.

The blonde boy from the Warblers approached them, running into Carlos first. “Congratulations! You guys deserve it! That performance was just beyond words!” the boy said.

Carlos nervously giggled before he replied. “Yours was too. You have an amazing voice by the way.”

The boy grinned and extended one of his hands. “Thanks. I’m Seb.” he said, introducing himself.

Carlos stared at Seb’s hand before taking it and introducing himself. “Oh… I’m Carlos.”

The rest of the group sent them both a knowing look before giving them both some space to talk. Ricky looked around at everyone smiling and laughing. They were all simply amazing, and Ricky couldn’t imagine what his life would be without them in it.

He had definitely won.

Someone voiced out that they celebrate their win at Breadstix. A plan that many soon agreed with. They had the van for the rest of the day, so they could most certainly use it to get there. The hype soon died down, until Carlos suggested that they head out already.

Ricky watched his friends as they all headed to the waiting room to get all their things. He lingered backstage until he was all alone.

There was a single spotlight still shining towards the center of the stage. Ricky felt drawn to it, like a moth to a fire. He reached his hand towards it and as the light hit his skin, he felt euphoric. He still can’t believe that the crowd liked his song. He always thought that since he was writing them for himself, he shouldn’t share it with anyone else.

“I told you they’d love you.” A voice spoke from behind the curtain. EJ soon stepped into view, and Ricky felt himself smile.

“I couldn’t have done it without you.” Ricky said.

“But the thing is, you actually did. You stepped into the spotlight by yourself and sang your heart out. All you needed was a small nudge is all.” EJ shrugged.

“From what I heard, all you needed was a slap from Gina.” Ricky joked. EJ laughed as he remembered that exact moment in the locker room. He touched the side of his cheek where Gina’s hand had hit him.

“It was one hell of a slap, by the way.”

“Come on. It’s Gina we’re talking about.”

“Yeah.” They both laughed as they agreed. Gina was scary but she really cared about everyone’s well-being. Despite what everyone else at school thought. She actually had a heart.

“Guess it’s moments like those that really make us think.” said Ricky. EJ just nodded his head, agreeing with him.

“Speaking of moments… Didn’t we have one in the waiting room a while ago?”

“Did we?”

Ricky couldn’t seem to form any more words before EJ’s face inched closer to his own. The warm breath that hit his skin, giving him goosebumps just like the moment before. Ricky glanced down at the other boy’s lips before EJ reached one hand to touch his face. Ricky found the touch soft and welcoming as he leaned into it.

EJ slowly moved his hand to rest on his chin, he glanced down to Ricky’s lips before pulling his chin up so that Ricky would be looking right at him. Brown eyes met green ones as the space between their faces grew smaller.

Ricky felt his chest hitch as EJ’s lips brushed his own. He stopped moving, still new with the sensation that he was experiencing.

EJ must have noticed because he soon closed the rest of the distance. Ricky let his eyes flutter shut, as EJ’s lips met his.

Ricky instinctively let his hands wrap around EJ’s neck, as EJ’s found their way towards Ricky’s waist.

That moment Ricky felt the rest of the world disappear. As if they were standing in darkness, where random colorful explosions sparked around them. Fireworks. That’s what they were. And they seemed to mimic what he was feeling inside his mind.

Everything felt simply perfect. Until the phone in Ricky’s pocket buzzed, which distracted Ricky enough to realize he actually needed to breathe.

EJ simply smiled looking down at him with cheeks as red as Ricky’s. He took his phone out and answered the call on speaker.

“ **Where are you?** ” Carlos’ voice blast through the phone’s speakers.

“Still in the auditorium.” Ricky replied, still feeling flustered. “I couldn’t find my bag. I have it now though.” He simply lied, obviously trying to avoid talking about what Carlos had intruded on.

“ **Good. Did you see EJ anywhere? His car is still here at the parking lot, so he hasn’t left yet.** ”

“I’m here Carlos.” EJ spoke out. Ricky simply face palmed himself, and shook his head. But he looked anything but upset.

“ **Oh um… Did I interrupt something?** ”

“Nope, all good. Hey listen, why don’t you guys go ahead. I’ll drive Ricky to Breadstix myself.” There was a short pause on the line before Carlos replied.

“ **Okay. See you both there!** ” The phone call ended. The auditorium now silent as it was before.

"So umm… Guess we should be going?" Ricky asked.

"Yeah, we probably should." said EJ, smiling softly at him. They both started walking slowly towards the waiting room.

Ricky then suddenly turned around swiftly, catching EJ off guard.

He gave EJ a quick peck on the lips, before turning back and giggling while he ran towards the exit.

EJ stood still in shock for a while with a dark blush on his cheeks, before he followed Ricky through the doorway.

-THE END-

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> and thats a wrap! :D
> 
> check out joshua's songs!  
> Common Sense: https://www.instagram.com/p/BkvVRj2FHyo/  
> Do It All Again: https://www.instagram.com/p/B7grCpwJojn/
> 
> other songs:  
> 2nd Song (Nini) is Valerie - Mark Ronson  
> 3rd Song is Don't Stop Believing - Journey
> 
> there were so many references to glee and hsmtmts in this chapter, so i really hope you spotted them all!
> 
> my personal favorites were EJ writing the second verse to Ricky's song and singing it to the entire glee club,  
> which is parallel to Ricky making his own verse of Nini's song and singing it at the auditions in hsmtmts.
> 
> and the fact that they ended singing 'Don't Stop Believing' by Journey, it may be cliche to end a glee fic, but you cant deny that its actually a good song and i personally love it as well.
> 
> which one's were yours? :O
> 
> i might write an epilogue for this story, so maybe stay tuned for that! :3
> 
> once again, thanks to all the readers. i love you all <3  
> bye for now! :P


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